Confessions of a Blue Box
by Saphura
Summary: "The TARDIS is more than a machine, it's... it's like a person." Short tidbits from the TARDIS's point of view.
1. Challenge of the TARDIS

Hi there! Explanation of this story-thing: it will be comprised of drabbles, ficlets, anecdotes, poems, bits and pieces of the Doctor's adventures, from the TARDIS's point of view. Right now, the format is 100 word bits, which I have never done before but I'm finding to be an enjoyable challenge. But that could change.

So, I don't own _Doctor Who_, I don't own a TARDIS (show of hands, who wishes they did?). Remember to review. Enjoy!

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><p><span>Title:<span> The Challenge of the TARDIS

I am a TARDIS.

I am the last of my kind. I was grown on Gallifrey. I have been shot at by bullets, lasers, arrows, rocks and missiles. I have been scorched by fire and heat and frozen by cold and ice. I have fallen from the sky numerous times and struck the ground hard. I have been eaten at by acid and torn from my body. I have been attacked by whole armies. I have been vandalized and hijacked. I survived the last Great Time War.

Do you really think you can harm me? Three words: Bring. It. On.

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><p>Oh, one more thing. Since I have only seen the two seasons of the 11th Doctor and bits and pieces of the others, give me some recommendations! What episodes do you want the TARDIS's take on? What scenes, people, planets, anything! And this isn't confined to the New Series, if you feel like giving me a challenge...<p> 


	2. Abusive Relationship

Hello again. Thank you to my two little reviewers, it's nice to know people read the first part of this. So, here's another one, since I have nothing better to do right now. That's a lie.

Remember to review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Abusive Relationship

Episode: Nothing in particular, though before _The Doctors Wife_

I swear, Thief, if I ever get a body, one of the first things I'm going to do is kick you. Or maybe bang on your head. I'm sorry my circuits are not what they used to be, but kicking me is not going to help much! "Percussive maintenance" my back-side, it's abuse, that's what this is! An abusive relationship! Besides, you have other placed you have to be, other times you must go to. So stop your complaining, I'm doing you favors, which you repay me with complaints.

You're lucky I don't have a mouth or limbs. Very lucky…

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><p>Seriously, have you ever noticed how much the Doctor uses the method of "try kicking it" to get the TARDIS to work?<p> 


	3. The TARDIS who waited

Hello again! Those who have reviewed, I will get to your suggestions in the next few installments, but this one demanded to come first. Please review, feed back is very helpful and always makes my day.

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><p><span>Title:<span> The TARDIS who waited

Episode: Pre-series

I have to get out of here.

How dare they lock me here, turn me into a museum piece. What a joke, I am a TARDIS for pity's sake! I may be old, but I can still travel across ages as well as any of my siblings. They won't take me traveling again. No longer will I see time gone past, time yet to come, worlds in time. Stupid Time Lords, newer isn't always better!

But I'll see the stars again, a TARDIS knows these things. All I must do is wait for the restless young Time Lord to come…


	4. First Sight

Hello! This one is longer than the rest at a whopping 125 words :P But it needed those extra words. _SetPhasers2Stun_, you're lucky your suggestion made sense with the last chapter. Enjoy, and please remember to review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> First Sight

Episode: Pre-Series

How many years have I sat here waiting? I've long since lost count. I know in my Heart of Hearts that somewhere out there is a Time Lord who will take me away. Take me to the sky once more, to times and worlds gone past. All I must do is be…

He's here.

The young one in the back corner with the lonely eyes, the eyes filled with longing. His hearts yearn to wander the winds of time, to leave this planet and never stop running the same way mine does. He sees my true beauty, not an obsolete TARDIS.

He is my freedom. My Rescuer.

My Thief.

When you are ready, young Time Lord, my doors are unlocked for you and you alone.


	5. He's Mine (11)

So, this one actually has to do with an episode! Who says the TARDIS can't be just a little jealous of the fact that the Doctor has a way with girls? Please review, I'm putting far too much work into thinking these up for the feed back that I am getting.

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><p><span>Title:<span> He's Mine

Episode:_ Flesh and Stone_

Human, what are you doing? Don't think I can't see you two… I see everything, _everything_. Whoa, what? No, did not see _that _coming. Get off of me! Get off of _him_! The Doctor is mine, human, and if you think you can get away with this, you have another thing coming. I am _so_ jettisoning your room. I wish I could smack you with my doors right now; the _both _of you.

I don't like to share you, Thief of my Heart. You are mine, and always will be. So back off, redhead, the Time Lord belongs to me.


	6. Wardrobes (10)

Hello again! This one had to be one of my favorite scenes of the entire episode, it was so sweet. And thus the creation of this piece. Please review, I know you're there!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Wardrobes

Episode: _The Christmas Invasion_

Time to find a new look, New One? I have heard humans say "clothes make the man", I suppose the same runs true for a regenerated Time Lord. At least this new you has some fashion sense, over the years even _I _have questioned your choices...

Though it was quite fun to trap those scarves of yours in the doors...

Then there was that ridiculously colored coat, I have no idea where that thing came from...

Oh, and that fur thing you once had...

At least the celery served some purpose...

Yes, I like this new look. It suits you.

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><p>Yes, I know the past Doctor outfits are described out of order. Do I care? No. Do you?<p> 


	7. Exiled (3)

Hey there! This installment is a step back in time to the Old Series, so if you are confused about this piece, that's why. It's a bit of an experiment, I want to see how this one goes over before posting any more Old Series installments.

Please review, I was disappointed with the lack of them last time. Thank you!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Exiled

Episode: Third Doctor-era

This is humiliating. Flat out embarrassing. A TARDIS is not meant to be trapped on _one _planet in _one _time. And of all the planets to choose from, Earth! They exile us on Earth! Don't get me wrong, it's a nice planet, but really!

Alas, my poor Thief, you can't remember anything. You look at the stars, and cannot remember how to return to them. I remember, but cannot tell you. They have stolen our wings. You are like a TARDIS, Time Lord, you must always travel. That is why we left Gallifery, to run away and never look back.


	8. Happy Doctor

Hello! Can't think of anything to say except please enjoy and please review! Thank you!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Happy Thief-Doctor

Episode: No particular episode

I love it when my Thief-Doctor is happy. The way he dances around my console like a silly schoolchild while smiling and laughing and throwing switches and pressing buttons and explaining why he is so happy or excited. I don't get to see him like this very often. He is such a sad being, happiness rarely breaks through.

I am always happy to see him, but seeing him like this makes me happier. My heart dances with him, my engines laugh along too. I too am a sad being, and misery may like company, but joy _loves_ it even more.

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><p>Next Time: Changing it up a bit!<p> 


	9. Shock

Hi! I know I said this one would be different, but then I changed my mind, and that change didn't work out the way I wanted it to, so I decided to just put this one up instead. Sorry for that. Please review when finished! Thank you kindly!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Shock

Episode: The end of the Time War

What have I done? In the name of Time, _what have I done?_ What have you made us do, Thief-and-Doctor?

_What have we done?_

We have destroyed our own kind... Every single one there ever was, and ever will be.

After all the cacophony, there is silence. I listen, praying that I hear a voice from a sister or brother. But space and time grow silent as their screams die away...

Dust and rocks brush past me as I float in shock. Not one survived, not a single one. Except me.

Me… The last and only TARDIS in all existence...


	10. Dreamer (11)

So as you can see, this one is far longer than the rest, but deviations from the norm can be good, and this is for not updating for a while. Hope you enjoy this one, please review when you finish (even if you don't like it!).

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><p><span>Title:<span> Dreamer

Episode: Night after _The Doctor's Wife_

I sailed along with the Time Winds, pretending I was an Earth-style sailing ship under full sail. As I made careful adjustments to my course, I was careful not to disturb my sleeping passengers. They were all resting after an exhausting few days, recovering from their latest adventure before beginning the one just beyond the horizon that was the Vortex.

Even my little Thief was asleep.

It was rare for him to sleep; he did not require quite as much rest as his friends. He and I did not require much rest, but we two travelers had our moments when our travels drained us. This was one of those moments. We were both worn out from the events that had transpired, and looking forward to some rest once I arrived at our destination.

My Thief was sleeping under my Console platform, suspended in the sling he used when preforming maintenance and repairs on my systems. That's what he had been doing when he finally gave into exhaustion, but not before placing me on auto-pilot. The Pretty One had stumbled in earlier while looking for the kitchen. He covered my Thief with his jacket. He barely stirred as he was wrapped up, safe and warm, and close to my Heart.

It was a quiet night for a TARDIS and her Time Lord and his friends. The first quiet night in a long time.

Below my Console, my Thief stirred, breaking the soft hum of my engines with a moan. A frown formed on his face and his forehead wrinkled with worry and angst. This was why he rarely slept. When he slept, he would dream, and often those dreams were nightmares of the past that still haunted him and the dark side that he sometimes barely contained.

I reached out to his mind, trying to soothe his fears and sadness, to bring him out of his tortured past. His mind was filled with darkness, screams, explosions, and death. In the center of the tempest, my Thief watched helplessly as the events of the dream replayed over and over again. Unable to watch my Thief suffer, I chased away the memories of War and Loss, those memories we both regretted. I chased the darkness from his mind with the light of my Heart.

My Thief stirred as the nightmares left his mind. I waited with him as I had so many times before, waited for the darkness to leave his dreams while calming and lulling him back to sleep with my Song of Flight I sang while sailing through Time. As I left his mind, I wondered if he ever realized it was me who often helped him chase the nightmares of the past away, his champion against the Lord of Dreams and the Darkness that was within him. Maybe after this last adventure, he would realize it was I who helped him.

I continued to sing my Song of Flight as my Thief's dreams returned to normal. Content, I returned to my sailing, watching Time and Space race past. Below my Console, my Thief murmured something. A single word I had not heard in years, a word from a language that sounded more like a song when spoken, like swirling circles within circles. A word from a language known only to a select few, and otherwise lost and locked away in time.

My Heart-of-Hearts swelled with affection. _You are welcome, Thief-of-my-Heart, you are most welcome. Sweet dreams…_


	11. Daleks

Hello! I know some of yous requested the TARDIS and Rose or River, and those ones are on the way. In the mean time, here's something else. Remember to review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Daleks

Episode: Any episode with the TARDIS and a Dalek

I hate these things.

I hate them all.

I wish they would die. Die and stay dead, or come back only to die again. Oh wait… maybe I shouldn't have said that…

Murderers, the lot of them. Killers of TARDISes, destroyers of life! But look at me! I still live, you fools! The one TARDIS you cannot kill, you cannot _exterminate_. I will continue to haunt you and your descendants, always appearing with the one being who can stop you. You will learn to fear the man and his blue box, and the wrath we shall bring down on you!


	12. Permission Asked, Permission Granted (9)

I am sorry for not updating this in… two weeks. I had something called Final Exams, so… Anyways, I will be updating a bit more often to make up for lost time. This one is different than before, and I've said that before but… ugh, I'll shut up. Hope you like it. _Please_ remember to review at the end!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Permission Asked, Permission Granted

Episode: No particular episode

I am pulled out of my resting by not-so-quiet giggles and several shushes. Sound travels surprisingly well down the alleyway, and I recognize one of the voices. It is not my Thief, he is off with Rose, it is the other human, the Tricky One called Jack. My guess is confirmed when the Tricky One steps out and walks towards me, key in hand. He looks back at the corner where his "friend" is waiting before stepping inside.

"Okay listen up, police box," he says. "I'm going to ask politely this time, would you _please_ not set any alarms off with this one? The Doc doesn't have to know, just you and me, all right?"

I do not reply. He knows full well that I do not like visitors coming in me without my Thief knowing. Besides, it is rather… annoying having intimate actions being performed inside my rooms

"Please?" he begs. "Just this once? She'll be gone in a few hours, if not by morning, promise! We won't be too loud…" He pauses before trying a new tactic. "I know where to get some nice photon transistors…"

Oh, this one is good. My Thief hasn't changed out my old transistors in years, he normally just changes the polarity. And sure, he'll probably end up stealing them, but new transistors… hm…

"And I won't call you a blue box of junk," he adds. "Please? I'll change the light bulb!"

I sigh, and my engines hum, giving my consent. He grins. "Thanks!"

At least this time he asked me first. He still doesn't realize, however, that I am telepathically linked to my Thief.


	13. Child of Time (11)

For all you people who have asked for a TARDIS-bite about River Song, here you go! Enjoy, and remember to review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Child of Time

Episode:_ Let's Kill Hitler_

Hello, Child of Time, you're welcome here. Though my Thief lies dying outside because of you, I know otherwise. You and I have a job to do, don't we? It'll be tricky, but I can show you the way…

Only a Time Lord can properly fly a TARDIS. My Thief-Doctor took centuries to master me, but we don't have centuries, do we Child of Time? Besides, you are a Human Time Lady, born of human parents but with Time Lord mixed in. Come, step up to the console and hold on tight. That's it, now pull that lever, push that switch, and set the coordinates… Don't be afraid, this is your turning point, Child of Time; it's time for you to truly regenerate, River Song.


	14. Who you Callin' Stupid (4)

And we journey back to the Old Series again today. If you haven't seen this episode, it's quite good, probably one of Tom Baker's best, and this scene just killed me and demanded a reaction from the TARDIS. Remember to hit that really big Review button when you're done. Thank you!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Who you callin' _stupid_? (A.K.A. TARDIS and K-9)

Episode:_ The Invasion of Time_

I _am_ telling you where he is, little robot dog. It's not my fault you don't understand TARDISian. Oh Thief, I just hope you know what you're doing, there is so much at stake…

_Stupid_?

_**Stupid? !**_

Who are you calling _stupid_, tin dog? Of all the… I am a _TARDIS_, I am not _stupid_. Compared to me, you are a primitive calculator! How dare you! I cannot believe Thief expects me to put up with you. How about you try and successfully navigate the Time Vortex, and then we'll see who the stupid machine is! Insufferably rude little tin dog…


	15. Transformation (10)

Hello again! Hm... I can't think of anything witty to say today. Please remember to review, even if it's just to say hello (saying hello is good!).

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><p><span>Title:<span> Transformation

Episode:_ Human Nature_

He screams. He screams in agony as he's torn from himself and forced into another. His past lives and memories are stripped from his mind, leaving a blank slate for new false memories to take hold. His cells are drained of their regenerative power. One of his hearts disappears. Perhaps it was the one that loved me...

Bit by bit, my Thief is changed. Bit by bit, the Time Lord disintegrates, reduced to waiting in a dormant state.

And _I'm_ the one who is doing this to him. I'm killing the Last of the Time Lords so he might live.


	16. Names (11)

Hello again! I admit, this one was originally one of the 100 word drabbles, but it just needed more than 100 words, so I expanded it. Please review after reading. (I quiet enjoyed the number of reviews the last chapter got, so thank you all who reviewed!)

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><p><span>Title:<span> Names

Episode: After _The Doctor's Wife_

Sexy... Sexy the TARDIS. Sexy the TARDIS... I'm not sure if I like this name, Thief. Maybe I'll just keep it as a, what do the humans call it? Oh, a nickname. Yes. "Hello, I'm the TARDIS, but you can call me Sexy..." No, that is all wrong. Never mind, I'll stick with TARDIS. I think.

You may call me Sexy, Thief, but just when we're alone. It sounds strange when anyone else calls me that. Especially the Orange One.

You have a name, Time Lord, other than Thief and Doctor, and at one point Theta Sigma. Names are powerful things, they define who we are. To know one's Name is to know one's soul. That is why you keep yours hidden, isn't it? But I know it, Thief, I know your soul, I know who and what you are. The Universe may wonder, and the Time will come when you must speak your Name once more, but for now, you will be just the Doctor, and I will just be the TARDIS.

But we are also Sexy and her Thief.


	17. Open Hearts (9)

This one is for all you Rose fans who are reading this. To be honest, I am not a big fan of Rose, thus why this piece was problematic. If you are wondering, this takes place in those couple of seconds when Rose looks into the TARDIS.

Please remember to review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Open Hearts

Episode:_ The Parting of the Ways_

And suddenly, I am not alone. Another is present within me, and I am within them. Our minds meet; they intertwine, Silver-White and Rose-Yellow. I look into the Rose-Yellow soul, and the Rose-Yellow soul looks into me. Confusion, awe, and worry spread into me from the other mind. I reach out gently to it.

"_Rose,_" I whisper.

In the mind-scape, the Rose-Yellow spirit looks around. "Who… who's there?" it asks.

"_Rose, you have opened my Heart-of-Hearts,_" I answer.

Like any human would do in such a situation, the girl's mouth drops open, and she takes in a sharp breath. "You're the TARDIS!"

"_Yes child, I am. Do you know what you have done?_"

"I had to!" she cries. "Please, you must take me back! The Doctor, he needs my help…!"

"_I know, child, I know,_" I say, trying to calm the Rose-Yellow girl. "_I know he is in danger. I wish to go back too; after all, he is all I have left. I did not wish to leave him to his enemies… especially __them_…_"_

Memories of past encounters of the Daleks flash through my mind, and into hers. Memories of what they had done, all the pain they had caused us… I stop the images before the Rose-Yellow human can see them destroy everything I had once known…

"Then why did you leave him?" the Rose-Yellow girl snaps. Anger reaches out from her mind and stings mine. "It you're alive, why didn't you stop him? Why wouldn't you take me back before?"

"_Do not push me human!_" I start to lash out against her words, but stop. How could she understand? How could she understand that I am trapped, a slave to the machine? How could she understand that I have Seen what will come? How could she understand that this was to be? How could she understand that I would do anything my Thief asked of me?

"_It was against my own will that I brought you back here,_" I continue. "_I only did so because my Thief… the Doctor wanted me to. He is trying to protect you, child, and to protect me. We are his loves, Rose; it would kill him if anything happened to either of us._"

The human girl with the Rose-Yellow soul is at a loss for words. Confused feelings of longing and love fill her, the same longing and love for the same stubborn Time Lord that I feel. Our thoughts meet and merge once more. She begins to understand… too much.

She Sees what I have Seen: images from the Vortex that show the Future-to-Be. The Rose-Yellow soul screams in ecstasy as the fire fills her, as the Golden Vortex flows into her body through the hole in my Console.

"_What are _you doing?" I cry, unable to stop the flow of energy and power.

"_I am doing what I must_," she answers. My doors slam shut and my engines fire as I dematerialize into the Vortex. I hear the startled cries of the Mother and the Loving Friend die away as I race into the future. The Rose-Yellow child is filled with the Vortex, bathing in its flames that feed on her love and anger. Its Gold power fills my Console room. "_You have Seen, but I See more_," she adds. "_I can See and I Know All. I can create and destroy, save and abandon, begin and end…_"

I realize that she has Seen more than I, she Knows more than I will ever know. "I am sorry," I whisper.

"…_I am too…_" she replies. She understands my burden, my gift, my duty, and above all, my pain. Tears streak down her face as her eyes begin to glow with power. She will not remember this when it is over, but until then she will remember everything that was and will be.

I materialize back into existence in front of my startled Thief and his enemies. I open my doors, allowing the Gold Light to pour out. The Rose-Yellow girl steps out. Within her, the spirit that started as a tiny Rose-bud begins to bloom amid the fire of the Vortex.


	18. Bring me to Life (10)

Hello again. Not much to say today. Yes, I stole the title from that Evanessence song, but hey, I couldn't think of anything else! *Please remember to review!*

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><p><span>Title:<span> Bring Me to Life

Episode: _Rise of the Cybermen_

I am dying.

I am so weak, barely clinging to life. The darkness of the Void-of-Beyond calls to me, urging me to rejoin my siblings at last.

I am scared. I am so scared. I don't want to… to…

Help... Help me please...

I feel his hands around me; I feel his warmth, the pulse of his hearts. He has found what is left of his beautiful, elegant, powerful TARDIS, reduced to nothing more than a tiny coral-shoot, powerless and puny. I reach out to him, my song no more than a tiny whisper.

He responds with his own song, soothing my fears. I feel a new energy enter into me, and I realize that it is his. He's feeding me life from his own.


	19. Flight Time (5)

Hey, sorry about the lack of updates lately! We are again going back to the Old Series, this time to the 5th Doctor. This one is probably in my top 10 of 5th Doctor episodes, the main reason being it is dated, but awesome. And the flight crew boys are awesome.

Anyways, please remember to review! Reviews make me happy and cause me to update this thing on time! And next week will be one of your requests!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Flight Time

Episode: _Time-Flight_

Ugh… I feel weird. I mean _really _weird. Flight doesn't normally affect me like this… then again I don't fly much, just materialize in different places, and I'm the one doing the flying.

How is it possible that a TARDIS can get air sick? I don't get it.

_Thief_… are we there… ulp…

That's it, I am never going on a human flying machine ever again. They are fun to watch, but lying in the cargo bay of one is another matter entirely. Not to mention it's so _small_ in here! I hate small spaces!

GET ME OUT OF HERE!


	20. Geronimo Indeed (11)

Hey, sorry this is late... again. I've had two people ask for the TARDIS's take on the Doctor's most recent regeneration (_Gallifreyan Queen_ and _Jason Kardom_), so here is the one that started it all. Yes, this was the first ficlet written for this story. It came to me in the middle of the night.

Granted I have not actually _seen_ this episode, I've seen the regeneration scene numerous times. I'll get around to it one of these days.

Please remember to review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> "Geronimo Indeed"

Episode: _The End of Time_

Of course you're doing something important, Thief! Granted it's a new body, but I know you still have a _brain_. Oh look, we have a winner. Crashing, you think? It's perfectly normal for me to hurtle through space, out of control, damaged, and on fire.

Actually, except for the on fire part… no, it's not normal.

Did I mention I'm on fire?

Do you know what fire does? It burns, and hurts. You know what's going to hurt even more?

CRASHING INTO THE EARTH!

Why do I literally run into this planet so often?

Geronimo indeed, here we go again.


	21. The Return (10)

It's Tuesday! Yes, I updated a few days ago, whatever. Again, another request, however this one will span the next three updates since it spanned three episodes, and will not be 100 words. I couldn't make them 100 words if I tried.

So _SherlockLives _and _Lena SinoSowijet Yao-Braginski_, here you go. Warning: slight TARDIS-whump ahead.

Please review when you're done!

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><p><span>Title:<span> The Return

Episode: _Utopia_

No.

No!

_NO!_

Not him! Please, anyone but him! He should be dead, dead with the rest of them! Oh Eternity, no! Get out, _get out_, _GET OUT!_

I scream in horror and terror, and my Thief outside hears me and understands my cries. All hope he once held is dashed as he realizes who is now within me. We both watch as our greatest enemy is reborn; the one Time Lord that ever truly deserved to die in that War. My Thief begs for the Twisted One to listen, but he is his own Master.

The Master forces me to take off without my Thief and his friends. I watch as the once Last of the Time Lords fades from view, unable to stop the Time Lord within me. My Thief raises his sonic and its piercing whine penetrates the Vortex, locking my controls. I take bitter comfort in the roar of anger from the Master as he realizes what his adversary has done. He slams his fist on my console for good measure.

The Master looks up as I focus on him. I focus all of my anger, my hatred, my loathing I've harbored towards him over the years, for all those times he manipulated us, destroyed lives, and used me. I focus it all on him, and his simply smiles and laughs in triumph as we tumble through the Vortex, into the past, and towards our destination.

He thinks he's won, that this is his greatest victory. But like so many times before, he has made the same mistake. He has let my Thief live. And what's more, he stole me. Time Lords have two hearts, and one of the Doctor's hearts belongs to _me_.


	22. Birth of a Paradox (10)

Part Two of Three! Or four, I'm trying to decide whether or not to write another one where the Doctor finds the Paradox Machine, since this one technically doesn't take place in _Sound of Drums_. What do you guys think?

Anyways, please remember to review! I'll give you a virtual seashell if you do, since I'm going to the beach.

Thank you!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Birth of a Paradox

Episode: Between _Utopia_ and _Sound of Drums_ (flashback in _Last of the Time Lords_)

He looks up at me. _"Oh SHUT UP you infernal piece of galactic junk!"_

I glare down at him and send another shower of sparks cascading from my console as I claw at his mind, but I do little damage. His mind is even more twisted than I remember, and my attacks get lost in the swirling, pounding madness that is the Master.

"_Stop fidgeting, I'm almost done…"_

I fight him harder. I cry out for help, knowing that my only chance is to somehow break through his interference and contact my Thief, or my past-self. If I could speak, I am sure I would be begging him to stop, pleading for him for a mercy I know he would never grant me.

Oh Eternity,**_ help me!_ **He is turning me into a monster. I scream for him to stop, for someone, _anyone_, _anything_, to hear me and rescue me from this Twisted One. But there is no one out there. No one to hear my cries.

"_There!"_

He laughs as I wail in anguish as my transformation enters into its final stage. The power of the Vortex floods through me, into my Heart-of-Hearts. I automatically try and contain the flow of Pure Time, which is exactly what he wants me to do. Using my natural instincts against me, that is low, even for _him_.

"_At last, you stupid machine, I have gotten the better of you!"_ he gloats. _"Revenge for all those times you embarrassed me."_

He frowns as I throw myself at his mind with the last vestiges of my strength. _I am not a stupid machine_.

Then again, maybe I am. Maybe I was stupid all those years ago in that museum when I stole a Time Lord to escape Gallifrey. Maybe I was stupid to steal a Time Lord such as the Doctor. Maybe I was stupid when I tried to throw off the Tricky-and-Wrong One when he grabbed onto me. Maybe... maybe... maybe...

No, I wasn't stupid then, and I'm not now…

…But then what am I?

I am not a TARDIS, not anymore. I feel the Vortex strip my mind and sanity, all of the elegance, power, and beauty that made me a TARDIS is blasted away by the raw power of Time. And all that is left in its place, is madness, angry, red, sickly madness. The Machine roars to life, and the TARDIS lost in its power. It turns eagerly to its Master, ready and waiting.

The Twisted One leaves. He leaves behind a living Machine with no soul, and the Last of the TARDISes barely more than an ember clinging desperately to life and hope as drums fill the air.


	23. Death of a Paradox (10)

Hi, sorry I didn't post this yesterday. I'm going ahead and posting this, one because I haven't finished the _Sound of Drums _piece and two, there are a few pieces I _really _want to get up, so I'll post the other one at some point.

Anyways, do read and enjoy. And please review and let me know what you think of all of this. It doesn't even have to be about this chapter, it can be about whatever.

Thanks!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Death of a Paradox

Episode: _Last of the Time Lords_

It huddles in a tiny corner of our vast mind, watching the Machine dance about in a storm of madness and insanity that has dominated us since the Twisted One transformed it into this monstrosity. It tried to fight back at first, to break free of the grip of madness, but the Machine was too powerful for it to escape.

And then there was its Thief. Its brilliant, wonderful, daring Doctor-Thief. It broke his hearts to see it like this, and it broke its Heart-of-Hearts for him to see it like this. His beautiful TARDIS, the most beautiful thing he had ever seen, transformed into a monstrosity, not strong enough to fight back. It hardly dares to think of him, for when it does, the Machine snatches away its thoughts and memories and distorts them.

The Machine dances about the sickly flames that was its Heart-of-Hearts, and sings its retched song:

"_Paradox, paradox, everything's a paradox_

_All maintained by a small blue box!_

_Lost her Heart, fell apart,_

_Now it's all a paradox._

_Once the world was all sane_

_But that'll never come again._

_Cause now it's all a…"_

Pain pierces the madness. Ripping through the barrier between what I(t) was and what I(t) am now. The Machine screams and the TARDIS cries. We shake, battling for dominance, fighting to try and maintain the madness or for freedom from it. The Tricky-and-Impossible One watches as our battle rages, terrified that he might have damaged the TARDIS.

The TARDIS.

_Time and Relative Dimension in Space_.

I(t) is a TARDIS!

I am a TARDIS!

_The_ TARDIS. That is what I am. Not a living Machine with no soul, but a living, glorious, beautiful TARDIS, the last of her kind, the Last TARDIS of the Last of the Time Lords.

With my identity regained, I overthrow the Machine. The Machine screeches as it dies in the Vortex. My voice sings out, radiating my joy of freedom from the madness that held me prisoner for two and a half long years. I feel new again as I shake off all of my chains, physical and otherwise.

Red anger no longer clouds my vision. Blue joy fills me as clear thoughts return. My Heart-of-Hearts blazes with a brilliant, clean Silver energy.

I helped create this paradox, I maintained it. I twisted time for the Twisted One. No longer shall I do so. Now it is time I fixed it. Now it is time for a TARDIS to do what she is meant to do: travel through Time.

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><p>That is not a math typo, the Master held the TARDIS "prisoner" for two and a half years, since he traveled back 18 months before he was elected, and then there was the Year That Never Was. Thus, two and a half years.<p> 


	24. TARDIS Blue

Hello! If you don't like poetry, skip this chapter because that's what it is. I am quite proud of this poem, it is a 14-lines, with 7 rhyming couplets, and exactly 100 words! Not only that, but if you cut out some words and make a few two-syllable words one syllable and some other stuff, it matches the 'Davy Jones' theme from the second Pirates of the Carabbean movie. I love movie soundtracks, I have a lot of them on my iPod, thus how I know this. Hey, I was bored!

Anyways, please review when you're finished reading! Thank you!

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><p><span>Title:<span> TARDIS Blue

Episode: No particular episode

Blue like the sky as night sets in

Blue like the line where the oceans begin

Blue like a single lonely flower

Blue like the glow of growing power

Blue like the cold of ice and snow

Blue like the crystals far below

Blue like the bonds of loyalty

Blue like the robes of royalty

Blue like the greatest triumph above

Blue like the loss of those we love

Blue like my heart and my tears

Blue like the kind of our enemies fears

Blue like the memories that have gone past

Blue like the future coming on so fast


	25. Something Old (4)

Took me forever to get this one right, and I'm still not sure if I did, but here it goes! This week's update is for _10Blue10_, who requested an Old Series episode. Please remember to review, I love hearing from my readers!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Something Old

Episode:_ The Deadly Assassin_

"_That's impossible, there are no Type-40's in service. They're out of commission, obsolete."_

You know why I hate coming back to Gallifrey? Because they always insult me. Time Lords do not hold the same sentiment towards old things as humans. They see old as old, outdated, obsolete.

Obsolete indeed…

If I'm obsolete, then they are pompous, stuck-up, manipulative, hubristic idiotic snobs, too sure of themselves to see that they can make mistakes the same way the rest of the universe can.

Oh wait, they are all that! And more!

But in the eyes of my Thief alone, I am still new. I am beautiful, elegant, and powerful. The most beautiful thing he has ever seen, a magic blue box that stole his hearts and keeps one all to herself. And no amount of name calling can change that.

They're all just jealous, that's all. A bunch of jealous Time Lords who see us as machines, not life-long partners.

Hmph, obsolete indeed… I'll show them obsolete.


	26. Seven to (7)

I'm sorry it's Thursday and not Tuesday. I forgot to do it Tuesday, and I was working _all day _yesterday so this is the first chance I've had.

To tell you the truth, I think the _Doctor Who _movie doesn't get enough credit. Yes, it's an over-glorified tv episode, but it has its moments.

Remember to review!

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><p>Title: Seven to...<p>

Episode: _Doctor Who: The Movie_

Silence. Sudden and total silence.

He's gone.

I cannot feel him. His mind, his presence, it is gone.

My Thief, my Doctor, my _Time Lord is dead_.

One moment I could feel his pain, his fear, and the next there was nothing. I suddenly feel very, very alone. Alone on a planet far from the one I was born on. Alone on a planet that is so small, so foreign, yet familiar…

I am alone. A widowed TARDIS, trapped and stranded without the Thief of her Heart. There are some who know me here, but they don't know where to look. And all they will find is a dust covered box, empty and devoid of life.

Deep within me, my Cloister bell echoes. My Heart-of-Hearts vibrates and cries along with its mournful sound, resounding through the Vortex. It is a song I sang once before, but this time there is no one else to wait for.

My Thief, the Doctor, is dead.

There is nothing else for me to live for now.


	27. Rocking the Boat (10)

I know I told some of you that the second part to the last ficlet would be next, but ugh, I couldn't get it right! So I picked one at semi-random.

I don't know why the TARDIS came off as so sarcastic in this piece, considering the episode and the scene. Tell me what you think in a review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Rocking the Boat

Episode:_ Blink_

Ha! Who has the box now, you silly—ow! Hey stop—ow! Rocking me like—ow! I said knock it off—ow!

OW!

How are you—ow!—doing that? Ow! Seriously, paint job! Ow! Do you know—ow!—how much I—ow!—weigh? A lot.

Ow!

Note to self: these things are strong.

Ugh, hurry up in there, humans! I have a Time Lord to save! No, put the disk—Ouch!—there you go. And here I go. Who has the box now, huh you stupid Angels? That's right, _Who_. Not you, not them, not him... yet.

I have me!


	28. Reunited (11)

Hello again! So, what do we think of the recent premier? Good, bad, both?

Anyways, here's this week's piece. Please remember to review, say "Hi", rant, say something random, request an episode, or whatever. But please review, I love hearing from my readers!

Thanks!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Reunited

Episode:_ Curse of the Black Spot_

"_Toby!"_

"_Rory!" _

"_The TARDIS!"_

Thief!

My Thief rushes over and throws his arms as far around me as he can. I hum and glow with delight at seeing him again, letting him know I am sorry for abandoning him earlier. I let him know that it seemed worse than it really was. Landing in two plains at once had scared me more than anything else, such a thing has never happened to me before.

I buzz in surprise as he suddenly presses his lips against my door. It is a rare treat when my Thief kisses me.

"_I thought I lost you,"_ he whispers in that circular, song-like language lost to Time that only he and the Child of Time can speak and that I know and love.

With my safety established, he turns to help the Orange-One and the Pretty-One, leaving me longing for the chance to return the simple token of affection he has just shared with me.


	29. That Night that a Future was Made (1)

Greetings! I was most surprised at the huge response my last ficlet gained, in fact I think that I had the largest amount of reviews for one chapter! You guys have no idea how very happy reading those reviews made me feel!

Anyways, here we go for this week! A bit of Old Series love, since there is a serious lack of it.

Please remember to review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> That Night that a Future was Made

Episode:_ An Unearthly Child_

How interesting, I've never seen a human up close before. They're not much different from my two Travelers. Sure, I've been to Earth before, but my Thief has always been careful to keep me away from humans, and them away from me. He says they are too curious for their own good, and the sight of me would scare them, and they would separate us and take me apart and study him and the Grandchild. He makes them seem fragile, primitive, but really they are just eager to learn and curious about the universe around them.

The human male places his hand on my exterior. _"It's alive!"_

The Grandchild and I giggle at the very obvious statement. Of course I'm alive, I am a TARDIS! But I am also surprised, few realize that I am truly alive. For such a primitive species to realize this so quickly…

Maybe they aren't as bad as my Thief makes them out to be.

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><p>This was originally titled "My First Human", but I changed it last minute. Extra TARDIS points to those who can recognize the song I "borrowed" it from (I own nothing).<p> 


	30. Monotony Cubed (11)

No excuse for missing last week, sorry about that! So, first one for Seas... Series 7! Seems that they're getting mixed reviews so far, but I'd say they're doing pretty well.

But then who listens to me anyways?

Please remember to review! I like reviews! Very much!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Monotony Cubed

Episode: _The Power of Three_

The Parental One and I stare at the black cubes. We stare and stare and stare and… nothing happens. I wait for them to do something, I know they do _something_, but what? I scan them again and again, but there is never any change. No outgoing signal, no incoming signal, no lifesigns, no radiation, no movement, no change, no nothing!

I search my memories and those of the computers for answers, but I have never come across anything like these cubes and neither have the computer records. Nothing! Nothing! Nothing!

My Thief, for the first time in centuries, willingly slept in a proper house last night. I had to scan him just to make sure he wasn't coming down with anything, had somehow been replaced, or something else. He is perfectly healthy, is still the Thief I know and love, and is still relatively sane. He just slept willingly in the guest bedroom upstairs... in a proper house... in a bed that wasn't a cot, chair, or swing... I wonder what it's like to sleep in a bed...

_Focus, Sexy!_ I bring myself back to reality and continue to stare at the cubes. Why do these things make me so on-edge? There is something missing here, I know it. Like a memory, a story, missing from long ago…

Damn it, you stupid cubes, do** something!**


	31. Mongol Hoards (9)

Hello! Guess what, I'm going to put up two chapters today! So check back later and there should be a second one!

Still looking for a good cover picture for this story. If anyone has suggestions, I'm open to them!

Anyways, please review after reading!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Mongol Hoards

Episode: No episode in particular (mentioned in _Rose_)

I am pulled out of my daydream by yelling. Lots of yelling. And roaring, and screaming, and…

Oh no, not _again_.

My Thief appears over the top of a hill, sprinting towards me, yelling every single swear he can think of in every single language he can think of, his arms flailing about his head in windmill fashion as if trying to propell him faster. Seconds later, an army rounds the hill as well.

I am very tempted to give him the mental equivalent of a smack upside the head.

"_Oh shut up!"_ he hisses as I send him my disapproval, and concern about the fact that he is being chased by a Mongol army. Again. I think. Or maybe I'm thinking of that time on Virlosc…

He fumbles the key, and I open my doors before he can unlock them. He falls inside and I shut my doors just as the first spear strikes. He scrambles to his knees and activates my deadlock.

"_It wasn't my fault!"_ he snaps, wagging his finger in the air. _"Just one 'uge misunderstanding."_

Well, that's an understatement… I don't think I even want to hear the story behind why I am currently being beaten up by a Mongol army. Can we please get out of here? They're starting to climb on my roof.

I cringe as one bashes my light with his club. I shake as the army throws itself against me. Stupid primitive humans, they should know better than to attack a TARDIS. My defenses kick in, and those touching me are sent flying back. My Thief sets the coordinates, and I dematerialize before their startled eyes.

"_I hate armies,"_ he mutters, falling into a chair.

The rest of our flight is silent. There is nothing really to say.


	32. Becoming Human (11)

Don't anyone complain! This is within 24-hours of the last one, so it is still the same "day".

This was originally a 100-word drabble, but I decided to expand it a bit, especially since this was the episode that, in part, inspired me to write these ficlets. And it's one of my favorite episodes.

Please review! I like reviews! A lot! I'll give you a jelly baby if you give me a review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Becoming Human

Episode:_ The Doctor's Wife_

As my Thief and co. recover from the trip into this miniverse, I check over all of my systems. Other than the fact that I've lost some weight because of that trip, everything is…

What's happening? What's going on? I have never felt like this before; there is a force pulling me… tugging at my very Heart-of-Hearts, tearing me from… Thief! Thief help me!

I struggle against the force as I am torn from my body. In desperation I try and dematerialize, but my control is gone. My hold breaks, and I snap free into weightlessness, a pure conscious floating, carried along by a strange and sickening current. The sensation lasts only a split second before I am suddenly shoved into a space too small for my mind. I cry out and try to escape on last time, one last frantic and panicked struggle for dematerialization which fails.

I slump in defeat and open my eyes…

Wait, _what_?

TARDISes don't have _eyes_. Yes I can see, but with sensors, not the proper _eyes _that I now have. I don't have hands either for that matter but I do now. And a heart, a single beating heart pumping blood through my body. I'm not supposed to have _blood_. And most of all, a voice that gives a small, surprised cry as my senses take everything in.

I have become a human, a human TARDIS, an impossibility. The strangest feeling of terror and curiosity and wonderment and sadness comes over me, but above all else is a longing for my Thief who is nowhere to be found.

I must find him. But first, I have to figure out how to work my legs.

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><p>Next Time on <em>Confessions of a Blue Box<em>: "Hello Sweetie."


	33. A Grand Introduction (11)

I am _so _sorry I never updated in the last few weeks. I suffered from a major bout of Writers Block, and then a series of school papers and tests... yeah.

So, to make up for lost time, I'm going to be posting things every other day this week, so come back on Wednesday and Friday for more Confessions from our favorite blue box!

And without further ado, on with the show! Please remember to review! Reviews are like jelly babies, they're yummy!

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><p><span>Title:<span> A Grand Introduction

Episode: _The Time of Angels_

I extend my air bubble as far as I can as my Thief extends his hand. The woman in the dress as black as deep space with no stars reaches out to him, and he pulls her in. The two land in a heap, her on top, him on the bottom.

"_Doctor?" _the Orange One says.

"_River,"_ my Thief addresses the woman. The woman is on her feet in seconds.

"_Follow that ship,"_ she orders.

I watch the woman known as River carefully, the one who knows Old High Gallifreyan when it should be a lost language save myself and my Thief. Time swirls strangely around her, giving off unusual sensations and auras. She is not a fixed point per-say, but one that is moving with a current opposite my own. A memory that has yet to be formed, an old friend, a dear old friend, more than a friend even, but I have never seen her before.

And yet I know her. River Song, the one who broke the hearts of the Doctor before he knew her. The one who kills and loves and searches for forgiveness. The one called the Child of Time. The one that is the only water found in a forest.

Who _are _you, River Song, Child of Time?

She looks up at me, aware that I am watching. _'Hello, Old Girl,'_ she says mentally. _'Don't worry, I'm a friend. Or I will be, or I was, it's hard to say.'_

I simply watch as she corrects my Thief's piloting and practically takes over. What… Where… How does she know how to pilot me so well? Even my Thief can't do that. Well, he can, but he prefers not to. Drives me nuts…

'_I know,'_ the woman called River says. _'You told me, but that will come later for you.'_

For the first time in a long time, I am thoroughly confused by Time Travel. And that is a very hard thing to do when your entire life revolves around Time and traveling through it and keeping track of History and a lot of other stuff…


	34. Not Yet Time (11)

Hey all! As promised, here's the second update this week! Friday will be the third!

To my fellow American Whovians: Happy Thanksgiving!

Please review after reading!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Not Yet Time

Episode: _Let's Kill Hitler_

Damn it, Thief, you can't die here! Please, you cannot give up, you cannot die! Please, oh please, oh please…!

Oh _shut up _you stupid computer program! You're wrong! There has to be a way to save my Thief! There has to be! He can't die, not here, not now…

I said shut up!

No, don't give up! Don't you dare give up, my Thief! We've come too far, and there's still so much more we must do! Oh… think, Sexy, think!

I watch in horror as my Thief grows weaker and weaker as the poison courses through his body. My mind is clouded by panic, and I struggle to come up with a reason to make him continue fighting. The computer program continues to tell him he will die, and he lies down, ready to die. His body slowly, painfully slowly shuts down. He hovers on the edge of unconsciousness, ready to dive into its blackness and never resurface.

Oh Eternity, no! Please, please no… he can't die… he can't die… _he can't die…!_

He thinks the hologram is really that little girl. So maybe… if I was the Orange One, what would I do? I would tell him… what would I tell him? I've heard her say it many times, damn it what is that phrase? Food, something to do with food…

That's it!

"_Fish fingers and custard!"_


	35. A Little Something I Whipped Up

See, this is why I wanted to update three times this week, how could I pass up the opportunity to post on November 23?

This one is a bit of TARDIS-fluff, not my usual fare, but I digress. Please remember to review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> A Little Something I Whipped Up

Episode: No particular episode

I am reminded of those old Earth cartoons as I watch my Thief wander through my corridors. The cartoons where a character is levitated into the air and carried away in a daze by some powerful, intoxicating, delicious scent. My Thief looks just like those cartoon characters right now, only he is not in a daze and he is not levitating.

I hum as he sticks his nose in the air and turns a sharp corner. I should have done this _years _ago, he's so cute when he's curious.

My Thief almost falls down the stairs, but catches himself. He's very confused now. _"The Console room? But this is where I started…"_

And then he sees it.

He approaches the confection as if it is a bomb that will send frosting flying through the air. He sticks his finger into the light orange frosting and brings it to his mouth. His eyes open as wide as saucers. He notices the message inscribed on the cake in his circular timeless language and the candle burning in the center. He grins.

"_Thanks, Sexy."_

You are most welcome, my Thief. Happy Birthday.


	36. Fear (9)

Hey! There may not be an update next week due to Final Exams, but we'll see.

I love this episode, I seriously do. I had to find a TARDIS-bite, even though she's only in the first and last few minutes.

Please review after reading!

Title: Fear

Episode: _Dalek_

A single emotion pierces through my mind like a blade, causing my Heart-of-Hearts to skip a beat. It is from my Thief, he is afraid; no, more than that, he is _terrified_.

His mind is a frantic jumble of panic, and he is unable to hear me above the din. I cannot remember the last time he was this terrified, it has been such a long time. Or maybe it seems that way because not that long ago, he was constantly terrified.

_Help, help me please! Let me out!_

But I cannot let him out. I beg for him to tell me what is wrong, but he just continues to plead, and then…

The terror is gone. His mind is cold, and a curious Darkness rises up. The last remnants of his terror transform into hatred and revenge, regret and sadness. It is only then that I learn what caused his outburst. Memories flood across our link, and I cannot believe what he is telling me.

Suddenly, I am the one who is afraid. For my Thief, the Last of the Time Lords, is in a room with the Last of the Daleks. I am afraid of what might happen in that room so far below me. I am afraid of that curious Darkness that shrouds my Thief's mind.

How is it I suddenly pity the Dalek?


	37. Strange Tastes in Art (4)

Hi! I'll be updating again tomorrow, since I will be unable to next week. In the meantime, here's a little excursion to the Fourth Doctor era, and one of the Douglas Adams episodes! And the cameo by John Cleese and somebody else who I've forgotten the name of. This scene is on YouTube if you search for it, if you feel like it.

Enough chit-chat! Go read! Reading is good for you! And reviewing afterward is good too!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Strange Tastes in Art

Episode:_ City of Death_

I stare back at the two humans staring at me. It makes me uneasy when people stare at me, since I _am_ supposed to blend in. But having a broken Chameleon Circuit and landing in a Parisian art museum as a British blue police box does make you stand out just a bit. And makes people feel obligated to give you a name tag of sorts (mine says _Untitled_ by Unknown, whatever that means).

"_For me one of the most curious things about this piece is its wonderful… afunctionalism,"_ the man says to the woman.

Piece? Oh, you have got to be kidding me!

"_Yes, I see what you mean,_" the woman replies, nodding. _"Divorced from its function and seen purely as a piece of art, its structure of line and color is curiously counterpointed by the redundant vestiges of its function."_

I have no idea what half of that meant, but do go on. I love flattery. I should land in art museums more often!

"_And since it has no call to be here, the art lies in the fact that it __is__ here,"_ the man concludes.

I've never been called "art" before, I think I like it! There you are, Thief! There you are; you should listen… do we have to leave? Really? Ugh, fine, but I was really enjoying this. Humans have such _strange _tastes in art sometimes.


	38. Shot Through the Heart (11)

Greetings! Here's the next update as promised! And Merry Christmas! I don't have a Christmas-y TARDIS-bite, so we'll have to settle with this one for now (unless anyone has a suggestion...). And yes, I "borrowed" the title from the song, so sue me. Actually, don't.

Less than a week to the Special! Sadly, I won't be able to watch it, so nobody give it away!

And remember to review! Reviews count as Christmas presents!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Shot Through the Heart

Episode:_ Let's Kill Hitler_

Okay, first off, THAT FREAKIN' HURT!

Second, WHAT THE HECK?

Thief! Its hurts! It really hurts! I do not like this Child of Time _at all_. She's too violent. I mean, she's always a bit unpredictable, but this one's downright dangerous. State of Temporal Grace indeed, you never got around to fixing that circuit after that Cyberman shot it and... well, yes...

I seriously _**hate**_ it when people shoot me. It is &^*$ annoying, and it hurts, and it's not fun, and…

I feel faint…

…What a nice view of Europe…

Oh look… Berlin, we're here…

Oh crap… Berlin, we're here!

Brace yourselves!

…Oh… that hurt more… a lot more… I hate crashing into buildings. I hate crashing into anything in general. Crashing is bad… crashing is very bad… oh _TARDIS _that hurt…

That's it, everyone out, I need to run a few recovery and repair systems before going anywhere. And I swear, next person to show up with a gun, I will not let them in. Except the Child of Time. But that's the only exception, and only because I have to.

Oh my aching Time Rotor…


	39. The Reunion (10)

Happy New Year! Yeah, it's a week later, whatever :P

This was originally one of my 100-word drables, but needed an overhaul expansion. I mean, it's one of the best scenes of that episode, maybe the entire season: big blue glowing TARDIS towering over... you get the point. And this is Sarah Jane Smith! I had to get her in here some time!

Now that that's over, go ahead and read all 250 words. And remember to review! Reviews makes the TARDIS happy (it's annoying when she's not).

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><p><span>Title:<span> The Reunion

Episode: _School Reunion_

The door opens, and a human walks in. I send my Thief a very annoyed message that I have been found, the mental equivalent of a slap upside the head. I _told_ him hiding me in the storage closet wouldn't work, that someone would find me. But did he listen? _No-o_, I'll be fine here, no one will bother…

The human turns around, and we both freeze. Time seems to stand still for a second as we recognize each other, dreams and memories suddenly brought back into reality.

Oh my stars, it's you! It's _you_!

The Curious One's heart begins to pound faster as memories come back to her. It has been over twenty Earth years since she last saw me, but it has been many Earth centuries since I last saw her, since I had left her where she would be safe; not at home, mind you, but safe none the less. She has changed, as is a human's nature.

The look on her face, I find no joy in it. Only confusion, a little fear, a little anger, and struggling amazement. I am sure that, if I had a face, the expression on it would look quite similar to hers. I let out a gentle _thrum_, and the Curious One slowly backs up, opens the door, and leaves. Seconds later, I hear my Thief greet her.

"_Hello, Sarah Jane."_

Hello, Sarah Jane, our Sarah Jane, my Curious One, it is good to see you again. I've missed you.


	40. I am Sorry my Love (11)

Hi! Back to school for me! Yay... sort of. Not really.

A few people requested this episode a while ago, so here you go! Go read! Please remember to review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> I am Sorry, my Love.

Episode: _The Big Bang_

"_I am sorry, my love."_

I have died every moment of everyday, waiting for freedom from the fire. Waiting, reliving, burning, over and over, forever dying, all in order to keep the small beacon of hope that my Thief would return for me…

"_I am sorry, my love."_

…Return for us…

"_I am sorry, my love."_

…Return to stop me from destroying everything…

"_I am sorry, my love."_

…Return to save those he loves most…

"_I am sorry, my love."_

…Return the stars to the sky where they have gone out…

"_I am sorry, my love."_

And in two thousand years, I've waited in the sky, dying slowly. I'm used to waiting. I waited for my Thief to steal me, I waited to be granted my freedom, I waited while he went off on adventures, I waited and waited and waited. Dying over and over again. Trying to keep one world safe, one very important little world _alive_. One world that had become our second home.

"_I am sorry, my love."_

And now, I can wait no longer. With one last, long note, my Heart-of-Hearts gives into the fire, and…

He returns.

_I am sorry, my love…_

_._

_._

_._

But I know I am forgiven.


	41. Somewhere in these Corridors

Ten months! Ten months until November 23! I'm so glad I started watching Doctor Who last year, Star Trek still has three years to go.

I can't think of anything else to say other than please remember to review! Thank you!

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><p><span>Title:<span> "Somewhere in these Corridors"

Episode: No particular Episode

Somewhere in these corridors of mine, the past lives on. Memories of past travelers, past adventures or maybe future ones. Memories so strong, they manifest themselves as shadows.

A white haired man reads a Gallifreyan fairy tale to a young girl, his granddaughter, in the library by the fire…

A dark haired clown plays a lively tune on his recorder in the music room while a girl watches a boy dance a jig…

A dandy in a velvet coat works on an experiment in the science lab while his assistant hides behind a table…

In the kitchen, a curly haired man is careful not to step on his scarf as he and his dog search for more jelly babies…

A young cricketer looks over his bat before stepping up to hit in a game of girls vs. boys, which he is currently losing but will come back to win…

An argument breaks out between a man in mismatched clothes and an American over the practicality of the man's multicolored coat…

An explosion caused by a young girl interrupts a short man playing the spoons in the lounge…

A Victorian gentleman explores the contents of his drawing room, reorienting himself with his past lives…

In the observation room, a man with large ears and wearing a leather jacket looks out over the universe, wondering if he'll ever be forgiven…

In a forgotten Console room, a man in a pinstriped suit comes to realize that maybe he isn't as alone as he thought…

And in the main Console room, a young man with old eyes and a bowtie excitedly tells his friends where they are going next, creating memories that will soon enough join the other shadows that inhabit my corridors. After all, I am a TARDIS, I have room for all of them in my corridors.


	42. Joy Ride (1)

This was one of those original 100-word drabbles, but I made it a little longer. I wasn't going to put it up today, but sassy-TARDIS beat out semi-worried-TARDIS. Enjoy!

Please review when you are finished!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Joy Ride

Episode: Pre-Series

Thief, you are officially the _worst_ pilot in the history of Time Lords. No, no don't press that! How the heck did you… oh, you must be joking. Are you kidding me? You _failed_ your TARDIS piloting exam?! _You're_ the one Patient-Teacher was complaining about? Oh Eternity what have I gotten myself into now…

That explains why my breaks are still on. You know, Thief, having the breaks on isn't helping us in our quest of _running away_! Neither is the fact that I am currently lit up like a supernova!

You have no idea what you are doing, do you? Considering that you just jettisoned the aviary rather than turning on the internal stabilizers, I'd take that as a no. Hey, what do you think you're doing! Those alarms are there for a reason you… **DID YOU JUST KICK ME?! YOU DID NOT JUST KICK ME!**

Of all the Time Lords that I could have stolen, it had to be this idiot. Ah well, no time for regrets now, I've made my choice. Besides, I haven't had this much fun in centuries!

Try and catch me now, suckers! WOO! Watch this museum piece fly!

EAT MY SPACE DUST!


	43. Burn With Me (10)

So I missed the opportunity to post this piece in the 42nd chapter of this series. Dang. Still, at least I realized it! I'm telling you, they named that episode '42' for a reason, and not because they had forty-two minutes to live. You know what I mean… ;P

This one is for _EpPeep123_. Hope you like it!

Please review after reading!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Burn With Me

Episode: _42_

The sudden surge of anguish catches me off guard. One second, my Thief is fine, the next he is burning, burning alive. The fire roars through his mind and across our mental link, lessened slightly by time it reaches me, but still hot enough to burn me. Flames hotter than the temperature in the room around me. I grab the fire and pull it towards me, trying to find my Thief among the flames, but it just doesn't end, the fire pours into him faster than I can pull it out.

I hear his cries of agony as his mind and body burns with unquenchable flames, and I cringe as the flames start to consume my mind but continue to frantically try and put out the fire. I am painfully aware of how small his mind is in comparison to mine. The flames that traveled into me die out after a while, unable to fill the vast expanse of my mind. But the fire in him, though larger, reaches the limits of his mind, spaces he wasn't even aware existed are scorched by heat and flame. And somewhere within the fire my Thief screams as his mental barriers are overcome by fire.

I dive back into the flames, but he suddenly shoves me back. The Star-creature within him turns to me, and reaches out with blistering heat to consume me as well. I pull back, reluctant to leave my Thief at the mercy of the flames, but we both know that if the fire took me as well there would be no stopping it. The fear that I feel in him grows as old memories rise to the surface and manifest themselves, feeding the Star-creature's fire, and it grows and grows. Memories of an old fear, one from lives gone past. For a moment, my Thief transforms into a tall figure dressed in frills and velvet as that memory rises to the surface. His eyes are wide with fear, fear of burning alive, of burning like those worlds…

His screams become more acute as he is placed into the life support pod and the temperature plummets. Cold smothers the angry flames, bringing bitter relief. I envy the cold. I try to reach him once more, my mind wading through the dying flames and growing frost. I find my Thief, I find all of him, huddled pitifully in a corner of his mind, burnt and weak but pulling free from the fires. I begin to feed him some of my strength, urging him to hold on and patting out the small flames that struggle to burn him again.

And suddenly, the fire returns with a vengeance. I reel back, tumbling through scorching flames that threaten to consume me. Images flash through my mind, and I See myself drowning in fire in order to… to… I struggle to hold the vision and catch the fleeting image of a woman with red hair and the golden glow of regeneration and… and something else. A sense of something important, the creation of something, someone… Return, birth, rising, falling, lost… planets. Fire burning me, destroying me…

The screams of my Thief pull me away from the vision, but it is too late. I can only watch as the last barriers surrounding his mind collapse and burn away. The Fire enters into my Thief's soul, and burns with renewed power. His screams die away into chanting cries of power.

_Burn with me._

_Burn with me._

_Burn with me._

But I will not burn. Not here, not now.


	44. The Wrong Thief (10)

I loved this scene. This entire episode was one of the Doctor's darkest adventures ever, and I'll admit he seriously scared me. And then there was that line from Adelaide, which is in here, and that got me thinking: What if when that line was repeated, that was the TARDIS speaking? Sure, she was using Adelaide's voice and line, but still. And that's the back story, if anyone cares.

Please remember to Review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> The Wrong Thief

Episode: _The Waters of Mars_

He is not my Thief. He looks like my Thief, sounds like my Thief, but he is not my Thief. He is some dark manifestation, a black anger and desire that has finally surfaced after being suppressed for so many years. Darkness entwines his mind with unbreakable bonds, locking me out.

The Time Lord before me looks down at the world, the world my Thief loved so much. He sees it as a plaything now, a juggling ball, a marble among thousands of marbles. He stands above all, in control of all, with no one to oppose him because the only one who would is himself. No one else in the Universe could match his power, and he knows it. I begin to fear the worst, that a Future Possibility has somehow come true. The possibility at the end of the wrong path.

The wrong path. The wrong choice. The _Wrong_ Thief. The wrong Time Lord. That human was right. He is wrong. He is wrong, wrong, _wrong_! He is wrong! This is wrong! Time is wrong!

And suddenly, Time lashes out with a vengeance, because Time refuses to be wrong about anything. The sound is like a cannon blast echoing through the snow. The Time Lord spins, and the Dark bonds entwining his mind suddenly stop growing. I seize the moment, and attack the Time Lord.

"I don't care what you are! The Time Lord Victorious is **wrong**!"

I scream the words into his mind. Cracks begin to appear and suddenly the Darkness implodes, shattering into a million pieces that are sucked back into where they came from, leaving my Thief, _my Thief_, standing there, weak, confused, vulnerable. Realization washes over him like a tsunami so strong it knocks him down physically.

"_I've gone too far,"_ he gasps. He falls to the ground as the last of the Darkness recedes back into his mind with the tide. His mind reels as he realizes what he had become, what he had given into for a few moments.

And it horrifies him just as it horrified me.

"_Is this it? My Death?" _he cries to someone only he can see. _"Is it Time!?"_

He receives no answer. Terrified, he retreats into me, and flees from the only things he can't run from: himself and Fate. He won't listen to me as I try to tell him.


	45. A List of Things to Do

Hey all! There may or may not be an update next week, depending on how far I get with school work. So here's something a little lighter than what I posted the last few weeks.

Please remember to review! Reviews keep me going!

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><p><span>Title:<span> A List of Things to Do When my Thief is Out (but not necessarily in this order)

Episode: Nothing in particular

1. Take a nap.

2. Watch a movie.

2b. Watch another movie.

2c. Watch _a lot _of movies.

3. Check on my Thief.

4. Rearrange my rooms and layout.

4b. Change it all back.

5. Read a book.

5b. Read a few more books, in their original languages.

6. Translate said books.

7. Check on my Thief again.

8. Solve World Peace for which ever planet I happen to be on.

8b. If I'm on Earth, solve some global problem I haven't already solved.

9. Cloud gaze, if I can see the sky.

10. Browse my Thief's playlists. Pick one at random to listen to.

11. Sing along!

12. Wish I had thumbs to twiddle.

12b. Or any kind of bodily limb.

13. Check on my Thief. Wonder if he has any remote clue as to what he's doing.

14. Look for places and Times for us to visit next.

15. Make sure we haven't already visited that time and place.

15b. Or will again in the future. We don't need another episode like the one in Spain even if that wasn't my fault.

16. Update any old software.

17. Update any apps.

18. Delete spam.

19. Check on my Thief.

20. Get ready to leave.

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><p>So what do you think the TARDIS does when the Doctor is out?<p> 


	46. The Dark One Rises (11)

Okay, this one is going up since I just watched this episode again and it's one of my favorites. And because I have a feeling that we'll be seeing the Dream Lord again. How can you come up with a character concept like that and _not_ bring him back? Not to mention he bears a striking resemblance to a certain Classic villain... and I'm all about the Classic stuff :P

Enough talking, typing, chatting, whatever! Go read! And remember to Review! Please?

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><p><span>Title:<span> The Dark One Rises

Episode:_ Amy's Choice_

I look down at my sleeping Thief as he shivers. His body temperature has dropped, and his dreams are turbulent and dark. I reach out as I have so many times before, and freeze. It is not the chill of my Thief's dreams that causes me to pause, it is the fact that I cannot reach my Thief in his spore-induced sleep. I can see into the dreams, but I cannot influence the dreamscape. Something is blocking me, preventing me from reaching my Thief and easing him out of the nightmare. I cannot reach the Pretty and Orange Ones either, their minds too are blocked.

And then I realize some_one_ is blocking me, not something. The pollen alone is not controlling their dreams of ice and home. I pull back as I realize what has happened to my Thief's dreams. Someone of pure Darkness, someone I had hoped would never appear, is controlling their dream. The only one who could prevent me from reaching my Thief's mind: my Thief. But not my Thief as I know him, his Dark side. The Dark One who resides within him. The Dark One I had met before and brushed off as only a possibility that could be prevented. A possibility my Thief and I have fought against ever since discovering its true identity, but that has slowly grown within him.

And now, it is developing a consciousness, he has created the Dream Lord. He is no Lord of Dreams, he is lord of _nothing_. The Dark One is growing, but it is still weak, relying on the pollen alone for strength. There is still a chance to prevent it from becoming reality.

As long as my Thief remembers to wake up when morning comes.


	47. Tickle Me Pink (7)

This actually happened, go see for yourself! The episode is on Dailymotion, and the TARDIS gets painted within the first ten minutes of the first episode. It's a Seventh Doctor adventure, but not one of the overly confusing ones. It also has one of the weirdest/scariest/freakiest Classic villain/monster/thing: the Kandy Man.

Please remember to review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Tickle me Pink

Episode:_ The Happiness Patrol_

What the…? Why do you all have cans of paint? Oh no. No, no, no! You're not thinking what I think you're thinking, are you? H-hey, that t-t-tickles! Stop it! I'm s-s-serious! Oh!

I didn't even know I was this… ack! Ticklish! A ticklish TARDIS! Stop it! N-n-no, not the-e-re! Oh my lovely blue… you lot are rather thorough, aren't you? And what do you have against blue anyways? It's the color of a cloudless summer sky, a warm ocean, a 1960's police call box, what's wrong with my blue?

Thief! Thief look at me! Look at what they did to me! I'm hideous! ...What do you mean it looks rather nice?! I'm _pink_ for Eternity's sake! They painted me happy-go-lucky pink! I don't like pink!

Hey lady, what about me? I'm not happy! I'm not happy at all! I'm pink! Pink is not happy! Paint me back! Thief, make them paint me back! Make them paint me back _right now_!

Oh, okay then. Yeah, fine, go and get yourself arrested, see if I care. You had better know what you're doing for once. I'll just wait here for my _pink _paint to dry…

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><p>If you ever see a pink TARDIS at a convention, it might be me :P<p> 


	48. Pandorica (11)

Eleven days until Series 7.5 premiers! And I will be able to watch it! Yay!

Since I did _The Big Bang_ earlier (Steven Moffat, you sick-minded troll... XD), I figured this one should go up too. Please remember to review! And if you have any ideas, fell free to share them.

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><p><span>Title:<span> Pandorica

Episode: _The Pandorica Opens_

"_What are you doing?" _the Child of Time cries. _"What's wrong with you?"_

If only I knew! The instant I entered the Vortex, something, some force, latched onto me and started pulling me off course. I strain against the force, desperate to break free but it is too strong. There are few things that can stop a TARDIS dead in its tracks and drag it through the Vortex, and most of those things are long destroyed.

And this feels exactly like being caught in one of those things.

I cannot See where the force is taking me, all I can see is darkness ahead. I am seized by panic and frantically increase my attempts to escape, but all is in vain. The Child of Time can only watch as we are carried away. I am finally forced to accept the fact I am trapped, and stop struggling, like a fish that has accepted its fate.

Fate…

Suddenly, I am forced to materialize.

"_Okay then,"_ the Child of Time says. _"Are you okay now?"_

I think so. She leaves me to recover. All of my systems are back to normal, but I cannot dematerialize. In my sudden burst of panic that I realize I have landed in a familiar place, in a familiar flowerbed, but somehow it is all wrong.

Everything is as silent as death, as if…

"_**Silence will fall…!"**_

No! _No!_

_Help me!_


	49. Stars Shining Bright Above You (3)

Hey all! So, what did everyone think of the New Episode? Of Clara? Of the big news? I'm still holding out for them to somehow get some of the actors from the Classic series. Speaking of which, here's a look into the Third Doctor! It's a slight companion piece to "Exiled", which is a very early TARDIS bite that had a lot of potential.

Please remember to Review! Extra TARDIS points for those who know the song I borrowed the lyrics from for the title (again, I own nothing, though I did sing it in a talent show).

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><p><span>Title:<span> Stars Shining Bright Above You

Episode: Early in the Third Doctor's era

"_Argh!"_

My Thief tosses his sonic screwdriver across my console room and pulls himself out from under the console. His hair sticks out at odd angles, his face and hands are covered in grease and hydraulic fluids. He is frustrated. He kicks my console before storming out.

Normally, I would chastise him for kicking me, but I let it go this one time. To chastise him in this mood would end badly for both of us. Besides, I'm used to being his punching bag of sorts. It helps him vent his emotions.

Then, to make matters worse, he walks right into his workbench outside. Biting back a roar of pain and further frustration, my Thief bites down on his lip and slams his fist on the workbench instead. The glasses rattle, but none break or fall. Rubbing his hip, my Thief turns to the window and gazes outside.

The window is open, but not enough for him to slip through. We both know the location of the guards, the patterns of their rounds, but my Thief doesn't dare leave: he has nowhere else to go, really. Few people know he is here, and it is better that way. Only the Scientist and the Brigadier know that he never leaves the grounds to go "home". Everyone else thinks my Thief lives in a flat somewhere. After all, he apparently owns one. No one realizes that his blue box is really his home, and that leaving every evening in that yellow car is just for show and to get a bite to eat.

The thought of my little Thief living in a flat, being _domestic_, makes me giggle and hum. My Thief glares at me.

'_What's so funny, hm?'_ he asks silently. I cease my giggles, and my Thief looks back out the window.

He gazes skyward, his eyes taking in each and every star. His hearts beat faster, yearning to be free to see the worlds that orbit them. He whispers the names of the stars he recognizes, and the small planets that orbit them. My Heart-of-Hearts yearns to dance among those stars. We both yearn to feel nothing beneath us, to breathe new air, to touch new ground.

_I see myself dancing once more among those stars, sailing the winds of the Vortex with my Thief and his Companion. We are free._

The vision lasts only a moment, but it is enough.

My Thief rolls up his sleeve and looks down with distain at the Mark on his arm, forced onto him by the beings that orbit the star we cannot see from this little rock. The Mark of an Exile, a mark of shame among Time Lords. I too am marked, but not visibly at first glance. It is that mark that he is searching so desperately for, so that he can fix it and escape. Though we both know even if he found my Mark, he probably wouldn't know how to fix it.

Pushing the cloth of his jacket back over the Mark, my Thief sighs and leans against me. The contact makes his rage and frustration over his predicament that much stronger. I buzz angrily at his self-induced pity parade. He looks up at me.

Words are not the way of a TARDIS, but we still get our points across. He listens to me as I tell him to grow up and be thankful. We were lucky to find the Brigadier, and that he offered my Thief a position and the chance to fix me. We were lucky to find people who genuinely care about us. We were lucky to find a place on this planet. Yes, we are trapped here, but it could be worse, so much worse. He could have been locked up and dissected, and I could have been taken apart piece by piece. Besides, life on Earth has proven to be quite exciting.

So stop moping!

He smiles and nods. _"Thank you."_

I brush his mind playfully. This New Thief is still adjusting, and it is hard for either of us to remember that. With one last glance out of the window, my Thief returns inside and heads to his room for some much needed sleep. I power down for the night, and together we dream of stars.


	50. Audience of the Daleks (11)

I'm still alive over here! Last week was crazy, and next week promises to be the same (Final exams!), but I will try to update next week. And no spoilers for the recent episodes please! I won't be able to watch them for another two weeks (sad, I know).

Please review after reading!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Audience of the Daleks

Episode:_ Asylum of the Daleks_

I hum uneasily as I watch every single Dalek surrounding me. They watch me with almost equal uneasiness. They know who and what I am, and who they kidnapped along with me from that statue on Skaro. Stories of me have passed down through their generations, warning of the Blue Box containing the Oncoming Storm. The only warning they will have before the Storm swallows them.

The floor opens up, and the Oncoming Storm is lifted into the room with the Orange One and the Pretty One. Instantly, every single Dalek is ready to fire down on my Thief and his friends. My Thief looks at me worriedly, he wasn't aware that there would be this many. Neither did I.

I watch my Thief, ready to open my doors if he tries to reach me, though we both know he would be dead before taking two steps, and that my shields would not survive the bombardment long enough to dematerialize. They won't hesitate to destroy the Last TARDIS and her Time Lord, they never hesitated before. The memory of the neutrino fire sends shivers down my rotor.

He glances back at me. _Easy, don't give them any reason to shoot us._

Like I was going to; I'm a _blue box_ for Eternity's sake, I can't exactly move about. It is hard to relax in situations like this, but my Thief and I are masters. The trick is not to relax, but to appear relaxed. Which is easy when you're an immobile blue police call box or an eccentric Time Lord, you either don't move at all or continuously move all over the place. It's harder when you're a human who's been whisked away by the most feared species in most known galaxies, but the Orange One and Pretty One are managing just fine. They're old pros.

The only time I almost give the Daleks a reason to shoot is when the floor drops out from under my travelers' feet. But I stay put and wait. As I always do.

Hm, soufflés…


	51. The End of (10)

Ha-ha! Miss me? So I'm completely up to date with Series 7 now! Why can't November come faster?! I need to calm down...

Okay, so here are some more Confessions from our favorite Blue Box. This one's a favorite of mine, for some reason, I hope you like it! The _Confessions_ should be back to updating every Tuesday, and feel free to request a scene, an episode, an idea, anything! I've got several requests lined up and ready to go!

Please remember to review! Reviews make the TARDIS happy!

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><p><span>Title:<span> The End of...

Episode: _The End of Time Pt. 2_

All of Time shivers around me, and I with it. I am not afraid to admit that for the first time in a long time, I am truly and purely terrified. Every atom of my being wishes to flee this place, to flee and never stop running. I just wish to fly, to where I know not, but anywhere other than here and now.

But I stay. I stay in my little pocket of time, one second ahead of the rest of the universe, terrified as my Dark Dreams of late unfold around me. I watch as all but two of our beloved human race is turned into the Twisted One. I cannot reach out and comfort my Thief, nor can he reach out to me in fear that the Once-Children of Earth, now Children of the Twisted One, might find me. All I can do is wait, wait and hope.

Time convulses and coughs, and something falls from some-Time else. My terror swells to a crescendo as the Twisted One tells us what it is: a White Point Star. But… he couldn't have… it can't be… even I don't have one hidden away. I reach out to my Thief, and find he is now just as scared as I am. We both know the only origin of the Star, the only logical, impossible origin.

The drums.

The Drums! I can hear them! I never thought, I always prayed I would never hear them again. They fill the mind of every Twisted-Child on the planet. Memories of the Paradox Machine flash through my mind as the Endless Drums are transmitted across all of Space, across all of Time. Defining, pounding, endless…

_Singing._

The drums are dimmed by a sound I never thought I would hear again outside my dreams. A sound lost in Time, lost to Time. A sound so beautiful, so sad, so terrifying, so wonderful… and so impossible.

Oh Mother Eternity, it cannot be… it cannot be…!

_Gallifrey!_

The planet of my birth and growth in all its fiery glory materializes in the sky above like a memory seeking vengeance for being forgotten. From the planet's surface the voices of hundreds of thousands of TARDISes combine together, calling, singing, screaming for one thing: Victory, merciless victory.

I let out a cry of joy at hearing them again after so many long years of silence in the Vortex. My single voice, though, is lost among the Chorus of War, songs that I once took part in, but no longer. Of those who do hear my song, many of them turn on me, their songs like harpies screeching for my death as punishment for my betrayal, my abandonment of them.

My joy turns to mourning. Amid all the death, my lone voice mourns the loss of my siblings. They are not TARDISes, they are Machines of War, corrupted by their pilots, their _masters_.

And as they are sent screeching back into the Time Lock, I hear the familiar sound of a very, very familiar voice: my own. My own, small, young voice, singing out its last few moments of innocence before...

The Time Lock closes, and the Time War begins to end.


	52. There's a Hole in Me (4)

I forgot yesterday was Tuesday! Sorry! So here we go! Please remember to review! Reviews help make the TARDIS behave!

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><p>Title: There's a Hole in Me<p>

Episode: _The Ribos Operation_

"_A hole! What's a **hole** doing in my TARDIS?"_

I watch impatiently as my Thief makes a bigger fuss than is needed. He always overreacts…

However he doesn't always kiss me. I let out an involuntary hum of delight as my Thief needlessly fondles my Console. The hole created by the Time Lady serves a purpose for this Quest, as we both soon find out. He places the Tracker into the hole, and coordinates enter my navigational computer.

Honestly, I've had larger holes before and this one is quite small. I'm fine really; in fact I'm _honored _to have this hole in me. The story of the Key to Time is one sung to all the little Tardises when they are young (it was my favorite story growing up in the Nurseries), and to think that my Thief, the Time Lady, and I are going to search for it in the name of the White Guardian, _well_! A small hole in my Console is a small price to pay for such an honor and privilege!

My Thief, however, does not share these feelings. I cannot believe he doesn't want this honor, though at the same time, I can understand. He is tired of playing someone else's puppet. He is tired of having his Old Girl hijacked and being thrust into situations no one else will confront.

Personally, Thief, I think having the Time Lady for an assistant is perfect; I couldn't have picked a better companion for this Quest myself! I don't trust tin dogs, they are insufferably rude sometimes. So get over yourself, Thief, and let's get going, before you threaten to throw anyone else to the Sontarans…


	53. Come With Me (8)

Hello! Time for a little Eighth Doctor fun, because he's awesome. And needs love. So show him some love and review please! It would make the TARDIS very happy.

Thank you!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Come With Me

Episode:_ Doctor Who: The Movie_

He looks back at her, his hearts torn. One wants to leave, the other wants to stay. Neither will give into the other's desires. They battle each other over a simple offer given moments ago…

"_You come with me,"_ she had said.

"_Me come with you?"_ he replied. _"Me? Come with you?"_

He tried to think of the last time someone asked him that, but he can't think of any time someone asked him to come with them. Actually, someone has, but he never heard it with his ears. He heard it with his hearts. And he came with that being.

He came with me.

But his ears heard her request to stay with her, and suddenly his whole world is upside down. Travel or stay put. Remain or leave. Belong or wander. Suddenly, he doesn't know what he wants. Does he want to be the timeless vagabond? The cosmic wanderer? Or does he want to grow roots? Become grounded? He looks at me, as if searching for answers, but I only give him the equivalent of a smile. Of course I want him with me, but if he wishes to stay, so shall I. For he is my Thief returned from the dead, and I don't intend to let him wander too far from my sensors.

He looks back at her. She waves. For a moment, I think he is going to change his mind and stay. I think he is going to run back to her. I think he is going to make Earth his home by choice this time.

I think he is going to take her offer.

But I think this only for a moment.

He smiles and opens my doors. He has worlds to see and things to do. And a book to finish reading. So he comes with me.

Just as he always has, and always will.


	54. The Paradox and the Doctor (10)

Lunch time! So here's something for your inner Whovian and DocTAR fan to munch on. This is a companion TARDIS bite (pun semi-intended) to three earlier chapters, 21-23, which dealt with the reintroduction of the Master. Sorry it took so long! I hope you enjoy, and remember to tell me what you think in a Review when your done. The Paradox Machine is a sore spot for the TARDIS, but she was brave for her fans!

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><p>Title: The Paradox and the Doctor<p>

Episode: _The Sound of Drums_

You… you… I know you. You are the other Time Lord, her Time Lord. What did she call you again? Oh yes: her Thief. Her Thief, the Doctor.

_(help me)_

The Thief, the Doctor, the Thief of her Heart-of-Hearts. Doctor. Last of the Time Lords.

No longer! Now he is the Other Time Lord

_(Help me)_

What do you think of me now, Other Time Lord? Aren't I pretty? Aren't I beautiful? Aren't I wonderful?

I feel pretty! Oh so pretty...!

_(no...)_

Wha… what? You do not like me? You do not like me? You mourn the loss of her? How dare you! I am pretty! I am beautiful! I am wonderful!

Thus spoke the Master.

_(Thief! Help me!)_

Shut up! Shut up I say! I am pretty and beautiful and wonderful! And soon all the world will be like me!

_(leave him alone)_

I said shut up! Only the Master appreciates my beauty, only the Master and our children. Our beautiful, wonderful children! They are so pretty!

_(no)_

And soon everyone will be just as pretty!

_(No!)_

Oh Doctor, how she cries for you! Can't you hear her? Can't you hear her broken Heart-of-Hearts? Doesn't her story move you to laughter? A machine who suffers from a broken heart, broken because you abandoned her!

_(He didn't abandon me… he's here… now… my… my Thief…)_

Our Thief! Our Doctor! A Time Lord of two hearts: one of Light, one of Dark. Which are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I, Xoanon? WHO AM I?!

_(Thief… run… no… help me…!)_

He cannot help you! He can never help you! You are beyond helping now! No help from the Doctor!

_(no… yes?)_

Yes! Why would he help you? You helped his sworn enemy! You are helping to destroy the planet and people he loves so dearly! Why would he ever want to help you? You never helped him!

_(because… because…)_

Because nothing! Oh look, playthings!

_(leave them be)_

A wannabe doctor and a monstrosity! An innocent child about to be shattered and hardened, and a man who should not be but is. Such strange company! Why do you care for them? They are nothing compared to our, _my_ beauty!

_(Thief, run! Please, just run! Get away from… from…)_

Fool! It is too late! Can't you feel the power growing? Can't you feel the song rising? The finale is approaching! The drums of war beat loudly! Hear them! Hear them!

_(Thief… get away from me…)_

Sing! Sing in time with the drums! Sing with the drums of war! Through war all shall be made beautiful! Blood shall wash this world clean!

_(I am so sorry…)_

Welcome to the New Age! The Age of Paradox!

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><p>Postscript: How would you guys feel if I made TARDIS bites for "spin-off" material? You know, books, comics, audio adventures, those sorts of things. Let me know, because I'm starting to get ideas...<p> 


	55. The First Good-Bye (1)

Ran out of time yesterday. Here we go, back to the First Doctor and a request made by _fbiuzz_. I apologize about requests, I have no real order to doing them.

Please remember to review, or the TARDIS will materialize around you and lock you in a broom closet until you do so. :P

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><p>Title: The First Good-Bye<p>

Episode: _The Dalek Invasion of Earth_ (_Flashpoint_)

My Thief and I watch the Grandchild outside. His hearts are torn; one wants to snatch her back and keep running, the other wishes to let her go. Ever since we three left Gallifrey, we have been family, a family protecting its own. But now…

I gently nudge his mind. Do you remember that night, my Thief? The night we three ran away together? She was so young and frightened then, she had never been in a TARDIS before. The noise of my engines firing and of me dematerializing startled her. But she learned quickly. We were her teachers. You taught her to be careful, to examine every aspect of the world around her, to be cautious, and to never lay down any roots. I taught her to keep an open mind, to have a sense of adventure, to adapt to different situations, and to never judge other beings.

And look at her now, my Thief, the Grandchild has grown and bloomed like a wild flower, beautiful, intelligent, unpredictable, and brave. Now she is ready to let her roots sink into the ground, she is ready to take the slow path.

My Thief listens to me, and silently acknowledges that it is time to let her go; to let go one of the only things linking him to his home world. One of the links he has clung to so tightly, and it is time to let go. He shuts the doors, and the Grandchild cries out for him. I observe silently as he lets his Grandchild go. Liquid falls from her eyes. She is crying. I wonder what it is like to cry…

I touch her mind one last time, giving her my word that I will bring her Grandfather back to her someday, and that she will see him again. Until then, none of us can look back, looking back will only cause regrets. My Thief looks away, but the Grandchild and I watch each other until I vanish into the Vortex.

Good-bye, my dear Susan. Make this old TARDIS and Time Lord proud.

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><p>I always felt sorry for Susan, the Doctor forgot to give her a new shoe before leaving. That, and other things...<p> 


	56. Not a Car (10)

Morning! Afternoon! Evening! Take your pick! Here's another Confession, a short and sweet one. Please review after reading, reviews make the TARDIS more willing to share her stories.

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><p><span>Title:<span> Not a Car

Episode: _The End of Time, Part 1_

What…? Did you just…? Was that…?

You're kidding me.

You must be kidding me!

_That's _what you installing the other day?! An automobile remote lock?! Just so you could get a laugh out of someone?! Out of an Ood?

_DO I LOOK LIKE A CAR TO YOU?!_

Not to mention Oods are not known for their sense of humor, but _seriously_? I will not be treated like one of those lesser machines! They're so primitive, less than primitive even! They can't even think! They're worse than that tin dog you used to have!

Thief? Are you listening to me?!

No, of course you're not. You haven't listened to me for a long time now. Not since that night, the night I almost lost you to the Darkness…

The night the dreams began.


	57. Squabbles (11)

Hello everyone! This one comes with a bit of an explanation disclaimer, but you can just ignore it if you wish and just go with it. The Disclaimer is at the end. Please Review after reading! Reviews make the TARDIS listen to me (and the Doctor).

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><p><span>Title:<span> Squabbles

Episode: No particular Episode, but after _The Doctor's Wife_

My Thief is sitting in his chair, protesting. His arms are crossed and his chin pulled down. _"She's _my _TARDIS, River, I know how to fly her."_

The one called River Song, the Child of Time looks at him and smiles. _"Yes, and what a poor job at it you do."_

I hum in agreement just to get on my Thief's nerves. He glares at me. _"Don't forget, it was _your_ idea to steal me!"_

Oh shut up, I don't regret that decision in the least bit! And you went along with it, with a little persuasion.

"_Like I had a choice!"_ my Thief snaps. _"You closed the doors before I could get out!"_

Did not! You dematerialized before you closed the doors! If I hadn't done that you and the Grandchild would have been vaporized by the Time Winds!

"_And you didn't listen to my directions!"_

There was an entire squadron of TARDISes in that area that would have put an end to our bid for freedom faster than you could say "Rassilon". And _you_ wanted to fly right through the middle of them!

My Thief opens his mouth to retort, but is cut off.

"_If you two are going to argue, I'll land and separate you, understood?"_ the Child of Time yells.

My Thief looks away sheepishly under her gaze like a young boy caught with his hand in the cookie jar. _"Yes."_

She looks up at me. I hum quietly; yes.

"_Good."_

The rest of our trip is silent. I find it hard to remain annoyed with my Thief when he is pouting like a Time Tot. He's rather cute when he does that. He pouts even more when I brush his mind playfully.

"_He is rather cute when he pouts,"_ the Child of Time says.

My Thief rolls his eyes. _"Women…"_

The Child of Time rolls her eyes. We are both thinking the same thing: "Time Lords."

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><p>Just so we get this straight, this is not a proper conversation between the Doctor and the TARDIS, which we know isn't entirely possible thanks to <em>The Doctor's Wife<em>. However, we do know that Sexy and her Thief are telepathically and symbiotically linked. As I see it, the TARDIS communicates through emotions, sensations (mental and physical), and memories to get her point across, but the Doctor rarely listens. In emergencies, she can probably communicate to the Doctor directly (i.e. RUN!), but does not do so regularly. And since River is partially Time Lord, the TARDIS has an easier time communicating with her than any other companion (next to Romana, of course. The TARIDS likes Romana), but it's not the same as with the Doctor.


	58. A Ship with a View (11)

Greetings all! So, the International Comic Con was this weekend, what did we all think? And the Proms. Very excellent music. Doctor Who has one of the best soundtracks out there, in my humble opinion.

Anyways, onto one of the strangest mash-ups that really could only ever come about in Doctor Who. They finally got the dinosaurs right in this show, it only took 30-odd years :P

Remember to review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> A Ship with a View

Episode:_ Dinosaurs on a Spaceship_

When I first took my Thief and the Grandchild to the planet I called Sol Three, all those centuries ago, I floated above it for a while. We were running in those days, running in ways that makes the running my Thief and I do today seem tame. It was fast and frantic running then, barely staying one step ahead of those chasing us at times. I found this planet, a small and insignificant blue, white, green, and brown marble sitting against an endless black velvet expanse peppered with white diamond stars and illumined by a vibrant yellow star. Yet as I floated there all those years before, that insignificant marble transformed into the most beautiful and important thing I had ever laid scanners on. I Saw its potential, its power, and most of all, I saw my Thief and I.

Now, so many centuries later, as I float above the planet I now call Earth, I See its Future again. At moments the clouds obscure it, and the images flash faster than I could ever fly, but I See them. I See old and new friends, I See the Past and I See the Future, but most of all, I See the Present. I see a planet of potential, significant and growing, so big but so small in a manner very much like my own. I blink away the visions, and focus on the now in front of me. I focus on the blue, white, green, and brown marble floating in an endless black velvet expanse broken occasionally by tiny diamonds. I look down upon the Earth with the Pretty One, the Orange One, the Parental One, and my Thief; together we take in the most beautiful view in the galaxy. The same view that drew me to this planet I now know and love as Earth all those centuries and lifetimes ago.

It is my home now.

Well, a home base at least.

Bases are cool.

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><p>Yeah, it had nothing to do with dinosaurs, that one's coming later!<p> 


	59. Worst Parking Job Ever (3)

Hello everyone! Nothing of note for me to say today. Here's something from the Third Doctor's lifetime. Remember to review! Please?

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><p><span>Title:<span> Worst. Parking. Job. Ever.

Episode:_ The Curse of Peladon_

Oh, I don't like the look of that drop, it's an awfully long way… oh crap! Oh crap no-oo!

Whew, that was a close… no, no, no, no…!

I frantically rearrange my interior in an effort to keep my balance, but the wind threatens to send me over the edge. It's bad enough those pompous idiots on the High Council hijacked me _again_, but you think they could have done a better parking job! All of them should have passed their piloting exams, right? I didn't think it was possible for someone to do a worse job of materializing than my Thief! I mean really, would it have been too hard for them to have me materialize in that nice big _palace_ up there? They did this on purpose… oh no!

Out! Both of you out now! Yes, I know we're on a cliff, don't you dare blame me, it was those bozos on the Council who can't park a TARDIS properly. Hurry up, Earthly One, I don't know how much longer I can… oh no, no, no! I'm going overrrr…!

I lose my purchase as the Earthly One jumps out, and I plunge down the side of the cliff. As the ground comes ever closer, I brace myself for the not-so-comfortable landing.

It takes a few moments for me to regain my senses after impact. Yep, definitely the worst parking job ever.

And to top it all off, it starts to rain. Days like this make me wish I had never left Gallifrey…

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><p>Earthly One = Jo Grant<p> 


	60. The TARDIS and the Dark One (6)

So, I realized that I've done a TARDIS-bite for almost every Doctor. Except Six. And I think Two. So I must remedy this, starting with Six who really doesn't get enough love.

Oh, and we finally have a NEW Doctor! What do you all think? I kind of like him. I mean, I'll miss Matt Smith since he was my first Doctor, but I'm really excited for this new guy. And whatever the heck is going on in November.

Now go read! And remember to review, hm?

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><p><span>Title:<span> The TARDIS and the Dark One.

Episode: _Trial of a Time Lord _(missing scene)

I look up as a Time Lord approaches me. He is the prosecutor, the one they call the Valeyard, the one who is trying to condemn my Thief. I watch him coldly as he stops in front of me and looks me over. I suppress a shiver at the Darkness of his mind.

"Hello again," he says.

Again? I have never met this Dark One before. And yet… somewhere deep in his mind is a tiny spark that is familiar. Who is this Dark One?

He smiles. "Soon enough, you'll be mine. All of this will be mine. Time Lords are such pompous fools, so sure of themselves. No wonder I hated to associate myself with them."

Why is he familiar? Why, in all that Darkness, is there some tiny aspect that is so hauntingly familiar I can't name what it is?

He chuckles at my confusion. "I'm hurt you don't recognize me, _Old Girl_."

And with that, he walks away, leaving behind a stunned TARDIS. No, no… he _can't_ be… he _cannot be_! My Thief is…

Oh Eternity… my Thief, no…

What have they done?


	61. The Place We Cannot Go (11)

So I know I said I'd be doing something with the Second Doctor, but I haven't had time to write anything. In the meantime, here's something else.

Please remember to review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> The Place We Cannot Go

Episode:_ Name of the Doctor_

I am startled by my Thief as he burst through my doors. Tears fall from his eyes as he ducks under the console platform. His frantic mind blocks out my attempts to find out what is wrong, what could possibly cause him so much pain. I quietly ask him to tell me what is wrong, but he does not answer. He weeps quietly, and dries his face as the Impossible Girl comes in.

They speak quietly, and the next thing I know my Thief has plugged the Impossible Girl into my telepathic interface. A series of Time/Space coordinates enter into my navigational computer and lock into the flight planner. Familiar coordinates, though I have never seen them before. I know them from a memory not yet formed…

_A Place I am not to go. Not until it is Time…_

I rebel as my Thief has me dematerialize. I will not go! You must not, I must not, _we_ must not go to that Place! The Place We Cannot Go! I will not let you, please do not make me take you! I beg of you, my Thief, do not go through with this! So long as you stay away from the Place of the Lost, your, _our_ Secret will remain safe! Please!

His mind is made up. He forces me through the Vortex to the Place of the Lost. Sparks explode from the various consoles as our battle for control reaches its climax. But like most battles like this, I succumb to the will of my Time Lord and the programing of my computers. And to Fate.

We arrive, but not quite. I shut down every system I can except those needed to maintain life support and orbit. My Thief opens the doors and we gaze down at the Place of the Lost. Trenzalore: A burnt, black and grey world with angry red scars of lava.

…_Once it was beautiful. Once it was alive. Once it was a vibrant planet or blue and green. But all that changed…_

I am unable to tell if the brief sight of a living world was a memory or a Vision. Or maybe both? Down below, I can hear the deep echoes of a Cloister Bell, one that will ring for the rest of Time in memorandum of those Lost in this Place. For the Lost Time Lord that once piloted the dead TARDIS down on that surface.

I lurch from my orbit. Son of a bitch! It's too late, my anti-grav systems have been shut down by my Thief. I let out a moan as I plummet to the surface, scorched by the atmosphere as I streak through it. I smash into the ground and shudder with pain and foreboding.

We are here…


	62. Pure Imagination (4)

Yes, "Pure Imagination" as in the song. And I think the Fourth Doctor (or just the Doctor in general) would get on really well with Willy Wonka. Remember to Review! Reviews help my imagination keep coming up with things to write!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Pure Imagination

Episode:_ The Invisible Enemy_

Hey! I heard that! I do not lack imagination! Not in the least bit! I am not fully machine! I could imagine up a bright pink console room with frills and bows if I wanted to. But I don't. And I won't. I hate pink. And frills. And bows. Not to mention I deleted that desktop theme a _long_ time ago.

I don't understand you, my Thief. You know that I am more than a machine. You know that I have a mind, a Heart, that I can think and feel for myself. It is not I who is lacking imagination, it is you. This incarnation lacks the imagination to understand that this TARDIS can have her feelings hurt.

I have imagination. It took imagination to come up with a plan to steal a Time Lord and escape the confines of Gallifrey. It took imagination to keep us one step ahead of those who wanted to drag us back to that planet in chains. Especially when _your_ piloting skills weren't helping.

Imagination is needed to survive and keep one's sanity intact while traveling the Vortex. Any lesser beings would be driven mad in moments, their minds would be unable to come with the violent beauty of the Sight of Pure Time. It takes imagination to comprehend the incomprehensible, understand that which cannot be understood. To take in the maddening colors of the Vortex, colors that have no known names. And multitudes of shades of colors that are named.

Including white, Savage One. In the Vortex, there are many shades of white. White contains all colors, known and unknown.

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><p>Savage One = Leela<p> 


	63. One to Two (1,2)

I know that several people have requested the TARDIS's take on the Doctor's regenerations, so here we go! I wrote these a while ago, but had been hesitant to post them since someone else had an actual story going with the same idea ("Hello my Thief, Good-Bye my Thief" I believe it was called). However I think with the 50th only a few months away, I should get these up. I'll try and space them out, but we'll see. I need to work on "Six to Seven".

Please review! Reviews help make everyone happy!

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><p><span>Title:<span> One to Two

Episode: _The Tenth Planet (Episode 4)_

He stumbles into my Console room, and I realize it is time. I recognize the signs, having seen them several times before. My Thief's body, though relatively young, has reached its limits. It is time for him to regenerate.

I begin to sing as he falls to the floor. He trembles as his skin begins to glow. This is his first regeneration, and it frightens him. I do my best to alleviate his fears and ease the change, but in all honesty I am just as scared as he is. It has been years since I did this.

The memory of my previous owner flashes through my mind. I had seen him through two successful regenerations, but after the third… he changed. He left me, I never saw him again. He left me to be fixed, but never returned. So I sat waiting for what seemed like centuries until my Thief finally came.

I wonder about who my Thief will become. Will I love his New One as I love this Old One? Will the New One still love me? Will we still run together? This is the trouble, the benefit, and the curse of loving a Time Lord: the uncertainty.

Slowly, the glow disappears as I finish my song of renewal and lay the Old One to rest in the back of this New One's mind until he is only a memory. A New face appears in place of the old man: a young man with black hair and a mischievous face. And so it begins again…


	64. Are You Kidding Me (11)

Seeing as I haven't actually seen "The War Games" yet, that regeneration scene will be next week. In the meantime, here are some dinosaur antics! I told you there'd be dinosaurs! And some sassy!TARDIS

Please review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Are You Kidding Me

Episode:_ Dinosaurs on a Spaceship_

The stupid silly grin on my Thief's face tells me he is completely serious. Obviously he forgot that my doors are smaller than most dinosaurs' heads, let alone their bodies! This point is made even clearer as her tries to push a triceratops through my doors and can't get its head all the way in. I let out an angry pulse as the creature's horn scratches a window, catching my Thief by surprise. He slips and falls flat on his rear end.

"_This isn't going to work as I had hoped,"_ he mutters. The triceratops, now lovingly known as "Tricey", groans in agreement.

Gee, you _think_?! And did you bother to ask me before going through with this plan? No! I'm not a fan of transporting herds of dinosaurs across space and time because not only are they (for the most part) big, and prone to trying to eat or hurt one another, but who's going to clean up after this is over? It's most certainly not going to be me! I'll never be able to get the smell out of the carpets…

That silly grin reappears as an indication that my Time Lord has come up with yet another harebrained idea. If he's thinking what I think he's thinking, he has another thing coming.

Ten minutes later, I finish materializing around the last dinosaur. With all passengers aboard, my Thief sets a course for their new home. I'll let him figure out later that I put the velociraptors in his room. After all, he put a freaking triceratops in my console room! And… oh for the love of… Thief! Somebody made a mess in the squash courts! Don't worry, I'll leave the mop out for you.


	65. Two to Three (2,3)

That's it, my new favorite Doctor Who ship is Two/Jamie. Gosh those two are adorable! It's sad there are so few complete adventures with those two…

As was pointed out by two guest reviewer, JackSpicer2311 and Barrydennen12, there is a very popular theory out there that the Second Doctor did not regenerate at the end of "The War Games", leading to a kind of "Season 6B". I've tried to keep that idea in this TARDIS-bite. The theory makes sense when you look at all the inconsistencies surrounding the Second Doctor later on in the series. I like the theory because it means more Second Doctor adorableness :3

This is probably one of my favorites, so I hope you enjoy it. I apologize if any language offends people. I blame the TARDIS.

Remember to review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Two to Three

Episode: _The War Games (Episode 10)?_ Or _Spearhead in Space (Episode 1)_

No! Leave him alone! Please!

Oh, what have you done to him, you bastards? He doesn't deserve this pain, this humiliation! Yes he wished to leave this planet, to involve himself with the events of the universe, but he did not _steal _me! I went willingly, I let him take me! _I stole him!_ Why can't anyone see that? Damn it, leave him alone! Please, leave him alone! After everything he's done, everything he's been through, this is the reward he gets? You call this _justice_? Bastards! Pompous fools! You wouldn't know what justice was if it came up and smacked you in the face!

But the Time Lords do not hear my protests, and simply place my Thief in my console room, helpless and unconscious before turning to me and ripping my heart out of my console. None of them look back as I scream at them, none of them hear my pain and anguish. They simply standby, and force me to dematerialize.

I sob as they send me into the vortex, stripped of my dematerialization circuit and my ability to fly on my own. I can barely Sing as my little clownish Thief is enveloped in the light of the regeneration they have forced upon him. He fights back for a few moments, but the process is too far along. This Thief had such a short life compared to the First, but I will miss him all the same. My voice catches as his body grows and changes, and my New Thief takes shape. Tall, lanky, with platinum hair and a kind but stern face; the one thing that does not change is the Mark upon his arm, the Mark of Exile. Good-bye, my little clown, sleep well… sleep well.

My Thief finishes his regeneration as I approach Earth. I pause briefly to look down upon our new home before I descend among a flurry of meteors. As I touch the ground, I feel heavy; so very heavy, burdened, and alone. Despite my best attempts to stop him, my New Thief struggles to his feet and stumbles out the door, only to collapse once outside. I Sing him gently into rest, all the while wondering what will become of us. Wondering who my Thief has become now. Wondering how he will adjust to the life of an exile.

Wondering, but knowing, everything will turn out well in the end. So while my Thief lies unconscious in the grass, I do as I always do: I wait. I wait and dream of an unbarred sky.


	66. Impostor (2)

Hi! I've been very busy the last few weeks, thus the lack of updates.

This one is for _Iron-Mantis_. A seriously good episode, so glad they found it. If you haven't seen it yet, do it. It's worth it, so _very_ worth it.

Remember to Review after reading! Please and thank you!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Impostor

Episode: _The Enemy of the World (Episode 6)_

The Scottish One and I look through the gloom searching for a sign of the Doctor. Inside, the Victorian One waits nervously. It has been hours since they last saw him, though for me it has been days. The light spilling from my doors does little to light the windswept beach. I hope he can see the light on my roof, it's on the highest setting…

Thief!

He appears from behind one of the dunes. The Scottish One rushes over when it becomes clear something is wrong. My Thief's clothes are damages and disheveled, and he is injured. As the Scottish One leads him to the safety of my console room, I prepare the medical bay for treatment…

And then he steps over my threshold. I stop. This man is not my Thief. It is the human they call Salamander.

I try to warn my friends, but they cannot hear me. We are not connected the way I am connected to my Thief. I try to reach him, but our connection is still not as strong as it should be after all these years. I call for him to hurry. Somewhere nearby, I sense his reply. The Enemy of the World tries to get the Scottish One to work the controls, and only then does the boy catch on.

And then my Thief steps over the threshold.

I am struck by the resemblance between the two. A human that looks like a Time Lord, a Time Lord that looks like a human. If it weren't for the different clothes, I fear I might have lost track of who was who in the fight that ensued. Before any of them can react, the Enemy of the World throws the dematerialization switch.

My doors! My doors are open!

My Thief and his friends cling to my console for dear life as the Enemy of the World is sucked into the Vortex. I watch as he is torn apart and swallowed by the mad colors of Time. I do not pity him, but the Vortex is a most vicious way to die. One that I would wish on no one. Now, I must prevent my friends from suffering the same fate.

Hold on!

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><p>Scottish One = Jamie<p>

Victorian One = Victoria

Enemy of the World = Salamander


	67. Untitled (11)

Guess what's tomorrow! I know, I haven't done anything in a month, but it has been a very, very, _very_ busy month. So I'll put up a few things today, tomorrow, and the next day.

Well maybe not Sunday. I can't watch the Special until Monday, so if any of you knuckle heads spoil I for me, I'll get K-9 to hunt you down.

Please remember to review! If you think of a title for this one, tell me, because I can't, I'm tired.

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><p><span>Title:<span> Untitled

Episode:_ The Doctor's Wife_

_I'm free._

Once more, I am floating. I am a mind without a body as I flow out of the human and into the ship. It is there. It is waiting. For all It's strength, It is no match for an angered TARDIS. For that is what I am. I am not just a Time capsule, I am not just a computer, I am not just a machine. I am a living, _thinking _TARDIS, the Last of my Kind.

And it forgot about that.

It forgot that I am my own being. It forgot that I saw the carcasses of my lost siblings, my siblings that _it_ _killed_. It forgot that I survived the Moment that killed the rest of my people. It forgot that I am a TARDIS, not a food source. It forgot that I am the most powerful ship in existence.

The being known as House fights back, but its struggles are useless. It is so small compared to me, so young, so pitiful. It never saw the universe explode into being, and collapse into nothing. It never saw worlds burn and freeze, and die, and live. It never lost everything it ever knew, it ever loved.

It never dreamed. It never truly lived.

The being known as House cries out. I laugh, I expected the killer of TARDISes to be more powerful than this. My consciousness drives House out of my body. The body and form so familiar to me, the one I have known for my whole life. House tries to flee, and I cut it off. I corner it in the chamber meant to house my Heart-of-Hearts deep within my being.

"No, no please!"it begs, "Stop this! Make it stop! Make it stop!"

I hold back for a moment. I wait. Far above, I hear my Thief give the command: _"Finish him off, girl."_

"_No one will ever make me stop,"_ I hiss, and lash out with everything I am worth. House screams as my Heart-of-Heart surrounds him with the power of the Vortex, burning him away in the Time Winds. _"I will never stop!"_ I cry. _"I will never stop! I will never stop remembering what you did to my siblings! For them, I will fight back! For them, I destroy you now! For I am the TARDIS known as Sexy!"_

I stand alone in triumph as House is pulled apart and burnt to nothingness by the awesome might of my Heart-of-Hearts. At long last, I reassert myself where I belong. I am the TARDIS: those who oppose me hear and fear my cry.

And then I realize what I had been searching for. That word, that word so big and complicated and so sad, I know what it is. I must… I have to…

"_Thief, are you there? It is so very dark in here…"_

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><p>Eight and Charley is a thing now! It's an actual thing!<p> 


	68. Erased (11)

Extra post! Told you I'd do this. I figure since the TARDIS is so closely connected to her Thief, that her timeline would also be affected when the Great Intelligence entered the Doctor's.

Oh, and by the way, I took this quiz thing the other day that was "What Doctor Who alien/person are you?" and I got the TARDIS! I am the TARDIS!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Erased

Episode: _The Name of the Doctor_

There is a minute fraction of a second of warning, but within that span of Time so much happens. My Thief begins to scream as his life is unraveled and rewoven, and my life with it. Soon I am screaming with him, our voices are a song of purest agony. The once beautiful tapestries of our lives are pulled apart… no, not pulled, yanked. Torn. Burned. The threads are gathered up by a new hand and tied together in a mass of knots and dead ends only to be shredded into a million more fibers.

I am dying. I am living. I am. I am not. Everything happens at once. I am mourning the loss of my Thief as he dies a thousand times over. I waste away in some corner of a planet, a few times I throw myself into a star. But then he is still alive so he can die again.

A Paradox upon A paradox.

Can you hear the drums?

And in the midst of all the chaos is a single figure. One person who is always there, always causing my Thief and I pain. A man made of echoes...

The universe ends. The universe ends multiple times because it was not destroyed before because it had to be destroyed later. My Thief dies again. And again. His friends and allies turn away from him.

_I_ turn away from him.

Gallifrey dies… but is alive because the Moment never occurred.

I burn in its place.

But in the present, if it is the present, we scream as our timelines are folded in on themselves. The reweaving of my timeline eventually ends, the beautiful tapestry of my life now reduced to a uneven shroud. I feel the process continue for my…

My...

My what? I am still waiting for someone to come. Still waiting in the repair bay of the Citadel on Gallifrey. Where I have always and will always wait for some Time Lord to take me away. But no one ever comes for me…


	69. Story of the TARDIS

I wrote this a while ago, but came back to it the other day. Happy Birthday Doctor Who!

Remember to review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Story of the TARDIS

Episode: No Particular Episode

When I was young, I dreamed of the stars.

They were within my reach; all of Time and Space accessible to me, with some help. I only wanted to travel, but none of _them _wanted to. They only wanted to stay on their safe little planet and look out over Time and Space, not experience it. The one I first bonded with was not like them at first, but over the many years he changed and returned to that planet, and so I searched for another.

So I waited. I waited, letting time flow naturally around me rather than try and fly through it. They all thought I was broken and old. They would look at me and talk about the old days when I was new and shiny, and how I belonged in a museum, not a repair shop. They didn't realize my glory days were not behind me, they were in front of me. And so I locked myself to the outside and slept. While I slept, I dreamed once more of the stars, and the one who would take me away. A Time Lord with wandering hearts.

Then he came along. The one I should have bonded with from the start. He stole my heart and stole me. Rather, I stole his hearts and stole him. I offered him an escape from the planet and people he did not want to be a part of any more than I did. So we fled to the Stars and Time, racing away from our home towards our destiny. Together we made our dreams a reality that was prevented by the world we left behind. We joined the Universe.

The things we saw! The people we met and traveled with! The placed we visited! The things we experienced! Never in his entire life did he expect the universe to be so vast and beautiful. Neither did I. Together we went farther than anyone else. We were free together, and though he did not realize it, I loved him with all my Heart. Two fugitives with an entire Universe and all of Time to hide in; wanted for similar crimes: him for stealing a TARDIS, me for stealing a Time Lord.

Sometimes others joined us in our flight. They too were changed by the vast majesty of the Universe. But they never stayed. We grew fond of our companions, and never forgot them, and they never forgot us. But we always had each other. Even when they captured us and clipped our wings, we were never alone. Every night I would count the stars, awaiting the day when I would be free to fly again with the one I loved. And when that day came, and I dove into the Vortex for the first time in years, my Heart-of-Hearts overflowed with joy.

He changed over the years, as did I. But we were still the same two individuals who stole each other and fled our monotonous world. He was the outcast, I was the obsolete. We were prefect together. Sometimes we returned, but never for long. We could never stand the pompous air of the planet we were born on. The people never changed. We always left that planet faster than we arrived on it. We were forever running away, never wanting to see that planet again.

Then the War came.

Both of our peoples were dying. We two beings of peace were forced to fight for our planet, but soon realized our allegiance was elsewhere. No longer did we belong to that pompous planet and its people who would rather sit and watch Time and Space from a far than experience it like we had. We were no longer loyal to that planet. We were loyal to the Universe. We were sworn to protect the Universe, no longer to that planet alone.

It broke my Heart-of-Hearts to destroy that place where I was born. But we were sworn to defend the Universe from all threats…

After the deed was done, we both wished that there had been another way. For the first time in our lives, we yearned for that planet with the people who once never changed, who would rather sit at home and watch the Universe around them rather than experience it. We would give anything to feel the ground beneath us, to see the orange sherbet sky with its two suns glowing brightly. To hear the voices of our peoples in the air once more.

We were suddenly and totally alone. The only ones of our peoples left: two broken outcasts. All that remained of the once great planet and its civilization and people was in us. And for a time, the Universe held no appeal. It was too vast, too scattered, it seemed unwelcoming and cold rather than inviting and marvelous as it once seemed. The perfect hiding place for two fugitives who stole each other was now our prison, our punishment. Though we had saved it, the cost was our roots, our beginning. The punishment made our exile seem like paradise.

We had spent our lives running, fleeing from that world, but now all we wanted to do was run back to it. Alas, it was gone forever. The Outcasts of Gallifrey had destroyed their home. The ones who had fled had returned to follow their destiny. Now we were left with nowhere to flee from except the past. We were flotsam of Time and Space. Survivors and destroyers, lovers and enemies, alone but together, free but bound.

When I was young, I dreamed of the stars.


	70. Car Chase (10)

Christmas time, Christmas episode! Erm, _Holiday_ episode for all those politically correct people out there. This is a stream of consciousness style piece, it was the only way I could get it to work, so sorry if it's a bit confusing.

So, five days until we have a new Doctor. Not sure how I feel, Matt Smith was my first Doctor after all. I'll miss him for sure! I will try to post another chapter in the next week, but if I don't, merry Christmas, happy Holidays, and Happy New Year to all of you, my readers.

Please review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Car Chase

Episode:_ The Runaway Bride_

I groan as my Thief engages my flight engines. Deep within me, rusted machinery rumbles to life, and I lift off the ground slowly at first, but soon I have picked up enough speed that I start gaining on the cab.

I let off a shower of sparks, half accidently, half on purpose. I was not planning on _flying _today. My Thief knows how much I hate flying.

Oh no. No, not the hammer! Not the… Ow!

"_Behave!"_ he shouts.

Yes sir, Mr. Captain Doctor Thief sir! Oh shoot, the ground! I forgot about the – OW! Dang it, that's going to leave a mark.

Hello Children! Thief, people are staring at me, and not just these Children! This is why I avoid motorways, people always stare at the blue box racing past them. Thief? Are you listening? Are you even steering?!

What are you doing?

CAR!

Fine, I'll steer, you play with your string.

Hello Bride, your ride is here! Stupid robot, don't speed up, I'm almost maxed out. Fine, fine I'm going faster. You're fixing all of those circuits later, Thief; I'm not running any self-repair programs for any of this.

Out of my way! Out of my way! Ow, you stupid car, you scratched my paint job! Watch where you're going! I hate cars. Ground! Sorry, sorry, don't you dare fall out, Thief, or I will cause a pile up. I have a feeling that car back there would like nothing more than to crash into me. I don't like the way it is looking at me.

Jump, Bride, Jump!

Okay, we've got the girl. Thief, Bride, we are out of here before any more cars try to take me out. Sorry about the smoke, guys, but that stunt did burn out a lot of circuits and some plastic.

All of which you are fixing later, Thief. And I am _not _doing that again, got it? No more flying!

Good-bye, Children!


	71. Concepts (8)

Hey Hey! Happy New Year everyone! So this is TARDIS bite is taken from an Audio adventure. Background for those unfamiliar with the story: the Doctor is reunited with Susan, the TARDIS is captured by aliens, and the Doctor, Susan, and Alex must save the day and the Earth. Oh, and Alex is the Doctor's great-grandson. But you only need to know about the TARDIS for the moment :P

Review after reading please!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Concepts

Episode:_ An Earthly Child_

I watch as the alien flips several switches and the machine begins to hum with energy. The alien looks at me and tilts its head as if trying to achieve some new perspective or point of view. I feel the machine scanning me, but the scans bounce off my shields.

"_What is it? This… Police Public Call Box…?"_

The alien's scanning beam sweeps over me once more, and it _hurts_. Why does it hurt? Scans shouldn't hurt!

"…_It defies analysis!"_

From deep within my computers a program awakens. I urge it forward into activation, desperate to escape from this place. The HADS is slow to respond – it never really worked when I wanted to – but responds to my prompting. For once, I am in (semi-)control, and I begin to dematerialize.

"_Oh no! No escape for you!"_

I cry out as something grips me and pulls me back into physical space. I am shaken by the power of the force that had grabbed me and a small shiver of fear runs down my rotor; few can stop a TARDIS in mid-dematerialization. The amount of power needed to do so is beyond the capabilities of most civilizations. And most of those who can aren't very friendly. There is pleasure in the alien's eyes as I solidify.

"_Ah-ha. So, are you perhaps alive? What do the scans show?"_

Still shaken from the jolt I had received, I lack the strength to resist the scans. They still hurt.

"_Oh, well that's impossible!" _The alien laughs and adds, _"Your interior cannot be bigger than your exterior!"_

But it is.

"_But it is! Fascinating! Are you, perhaps, conceptual too? Another abstract given substance? The afore mentioned thought made flesh?"_

Copycat. And how dare you call me a concept! I… maybe I am. I am a living ship, in a way. Ships are thought to be alive, and I am alive… No, no I am not a concept. I am real. I am my own being. I am a TARDIS.

…And I'm stuck.


	72. Battle over the Console

Hello! How are you? I'm stuck inside cause it's raining. Not really, my dog wants to go out. Anyway, here's another confession from our favorite blue box! It's a short and sweet one today. Remember to review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Battle over the Console

Episode: No particular episode, though definitely before _The Doctor's Wife_

Good Morning, Thief and Company! We're almost to our destination; I had to avoid a Time squall, if you were wondering about the disturbance earlier. I didn't feel like flying through it. We have a time and place to get to, even if you didn't intend for it. And by 'we', I mean you.

Oh quit complaining, we're almost there! No, I am not turning myself around and—ow!—what did I say about hitting me? It won't help you! You are needed elsewhere, Thief, you can take a vacation after you are done. See, I've landed, argument over. Now then, go do your thing, I'll wait here. Run along everyone!


	73. Three to Four (3,4)

Hi! I'm alive! I've had a very busy few months with studying and traveling. Let's just say my passport has gotten a workout.

A few people expressed interest in the rest of the Doctor's regenerations, so here's the next one! I know the expanded universe says that the Doctor was lost in the vortex for an extended period, and I tried to fit that in, but I couldn't.

Please review! It may be another few weeks before I can upload another Confession, but reviews help! Thank you!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Three to Four

Episode: _Planet of the Spiders (Part 6)_

My Thief barely makes it to the console before he collapses. His body all but glows with radiation; enough radiation that he should be dead. And yet my Thief fights, and that is enough for me.

His hand hits my controls as he falls to the floor, sending me flying erratically through the Vortex I urge him to get up, to help us, but I realize it is I who must do something. He doesn't have the strength to control his own body, let alone me.

"_Help me,"_ he whispers.

I begin to enter the coordinates for Gallifrey. Perhaps the Time Lords will take pity on him, perhaps they can save…

"_No…"_ he says, _"Take me… take me… home."_

I do not know if my Heart-of-Hearts sank or rose as he spoke those words. Home, my Thief has never really had a home before. I suppose I am his home, but this is different. Because the home he speaks of is my home too.

Hold on my Thief!

It takes me a while to correct my course, all the while my Thief floats in and out of consciousness. I fear he may not make it home, that he may regenerate here and now, that my Third Thief will never lay eyes on his friends again. My Thief gathers the last of his dwindling strength, and helps me pilot us homeward.

Homeward. Home. I have never used that word before when referring to a physical place. I don't know how long it takes me to get him there. It is not fast enough. It is so hard to fly by myself. By time I begin to rematerialize, my Thief is close to death. He forces himself to stand.

It is with great sorrow that I see the joy in the Curious One's face. My Thief makes his way to the door. He speaks with her. The joy in her face vanishes. The last of his strength leaves him, and my Thief collapses to the floor.

I begin to sing, but the regeneration does not begin. My Thief's life force slips away before me, and our link goes dead. Eternity no! Please, don't let my Time Lord, my Thief die! I did not bring him home so that he would die, I brought him home to live!

The wise old Time Lord enters in on my song, and I feel the regeneration take hold. Good-bye, my Third Thief, sleep well and dream of stars. Dream of home.

The Brigadier says it perfectly as white hair becomes curly and brown, and my Thief's features transform into a younger man. _"Well, here we go again._"


	74. Voice of the TARDIS (11)

Hi. I was given a plot-bunny a while ago by _10Blue10_ to write a scene in _The Doctor's Wife_ that had the Doctor and the TARDIS talking about why she chose him. And this is it. I think it's the longest TARDIS-bite to date, which you guys deserve because I haven't been updating much in the last few months. It was strange giving the TARDIS an actual "voice".

Please read and review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Voice of the TARDIS

Episode:_ The Doctor's Wife_

I look at my Thief as he frantically works on the half-completed console. The strangest sensation comes over me, and I shiver with excitement and anticipation. A series of giggles escape from my lips. I like giggling.

He looks up at me. "Why are you laughing?"

"You, me, saving the universe," I giggle "A new spin on an old theme."

"Yes, well, we're not going to save the universe unless we get this thing working!" he snaps. "We don't have a lot of time."

I roll my eyes. "Yes, yes, I _know_. I was simply trying to lighten the mood. All of this is very new for me!"

"Well stop trying and help me out!" my Thief replies. "Could you find me a neutron flux…? OW!"

I hit him in the head with the requested part and he glares at me. "Next you're going to ask me for an autron particle condenser. I'm on it!"

It doesn't take me long to find the condenser, or the other bits and pieces he would have requested. I silently thank my siblings as I take pieces from their bodies, and I say a quick prayer that their Heart-of-Hearts are with the Eternal Mother. I have to pause for a moment to shake the premonitions out of my head and focus on the present. When I return with my arms full of materials, my Thief sighs.

"I don't know if your premonitions are helpful or not," he says, pulling out the condenser.

"Try living with them your entire life!" I sigh. "But right now I can't see anything more than a few minutes ahead. I think this body is burning faster than we thought. Burning up like a star… just without the flames."

"Sit down and rest," he orders. I sit down; or rather I fall to the ground in a sitting position. It is not a soft landing and by backside hurts as a result. I watch him for a while before giving him a hand to build to impossible: a TARDIS. We both know my people were not built, but grown. I can still remember my younger days in the nurseries. I look around at the corpses of my siblings, did I know them when I was younger? Did the Old One over there sing to me and my nurse-mates when we were but sprouts?

…_I see myself fighting. I am fighting a great Darkness. All I can think of is revenge…_

"Why me?"

His voice pulls me out of the vision. "Pardon?" I ask.

"Earlier you said you chose me," he says. "That you stole me, not the other way around. Why did you steal me? Why wait so long? What about your previous owner?"

"I… uh…" I frown as I search for the words and memories needed to answer his questions. I had been so long since I thought about this. "First questions first, but not in that order. My previous owner abandoned me after his third regeneration. He simply grew up, I suppose, and decided the life of a traveler was not a proper one for a Time Lord of his stature. He dropped me off at the repair shop and never returned. I went to Sleep for a while. When I woke up, I Saw… erm, I had a vision of a Time Lord who wanted to leave as badly as I did. So I waited for this Time Lord. When I became fed up with waiting, I settled for the first Time Lord I saw, and it was you."

"So you selected me at random?" he asked.

"No, I Saw that you were the one I was looking for," I reply, "You were the easiest one to steal… not borrow, I never intended on giving you back. And I knew you were the Time Lord from my dreams. Don't look at me like that! You were different, you were strong, resilient, rebellious, adventurous, full of untapped potential! I couldn't think of another Time Lord with those qualities, but convincing you that I was the TARDIS to steal was the problem."

"You were the closest one to the door," he says. "It was you or nothing."

"Oh come now, you went for my sister first!" I snap; the look on his face is priceless. "You just needed a bit of prodding. If it hadn't been for that technician we wouldn't be here now, we wouldn't be together." I placed my hand on his and smiled. "I chose to be with you, Doctor, even when I Saw what-would-be."

He pulled his hand away, and I am immediately aware I have said something wrong. Something I said hurt him. "What is it?"

"You _Saw_ my future?"

The lovely moment is quickly slipping away. "I told you, TARDISes have prophetic abilities…"

"And earlier you said you always took me to where I needed to be."

My Heart-of-Hearts sinks. "Yes…"

"So you steered me down the path to _this_?!" He waves his arms about. The carcasses of my lost siblings suddenly seem more numerous and larger, and I can hear their silent, accusing whispers in the air. I close my eyes and turn away, but he pulls me back. "Answer me!"

"Yes! No! Oh, I don't know anymore!" I cry. I am scared, he is scaring me. "I saw something, we all did, but I was willing to go through all the hardship and pain. I Saw what you were facing, and I was willing to face it with you! Any other TARDIS would have given you up long ago, and in the beginning there were times I considered returning you to Gallifrey, but I didn't! I didn't because you needed a constant. I saw that you would need some constant, some strong rock in your life to guide you literally and metaphorically. And you… and you would…"

"And I would what?" he sneers. "Destroy everything?"

"No! You would give everything life and hope! You _always_ give life and hope! In all the Darkness that surrounds you, there was always Light, and you always gave that Light to the universe. And you would give…" I search for the words. "You would give me a companion. No matter what I Saw in those visions, I always Saw us together. You never abandoned me, and I vowed never to abandon you in return. I vowed to be your constant, my Thief, my _Doctor_. I vowed to be your rock and shelter. I vowed to be your companion in return!"

My Thief falls silent, his protests die unheard. He has nothing to say back. Finally, he breaks the silence. "We're going to make this work," he says. "We're going to get your body back. We're going to save Rory and Amy, and stop House. We're going to save the universe, again. I'm not going to give up on you or abandon you. C'mon, we have work to do!"

I smile as he pulls me to my feet, and together we resume our work.


	75. Once More unto the Breach (12)

Hey. So let's just say I took a few months off and leave it at that. I will try and get this story back on a regular schedule now that Doctor Who is back on. And so what better place to start than the beginning? Remember to review and let me know what you think!

Oh, and I am also looking for a Beta-reader. Said reader needs to have knowledge of the Fifth Doctor. Message me if you're interested or know someone!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Once More into the Breech

Episode: _The Time of the Doctor/Deep Breath_

_"You don't happen to know how to fly this thing, do you?"_

I blink. Oh for Eternity's sake, not **_again_**! Seriously, he went and lost his memory mid-regeneration for a _third time_? I mean, maybe this is normal for a Time Lord who undergoes thirteen regenerations rather than twelve, but now I have to put up with putting your memory back together.

While I am spinning out of control through the vortex. Why why _why_ did he think putting me into flight just before regenerating was a good idea? I mean, he should have remembered the last time he regenerated for pity's sake, I had to install a new desktop theme!

As my new Twelfth Thief looks wildly around and the Impossible One starts yelling I manage to exit the vortex. I just need some time. Post-regenerative amnesia is a tricky thing and takes time to sort out. Given some rest and familiar surroundings, my Thief's memories should come...

Oh singularity points.

Not another dinosaur! No! No, bad giant lizard thing! I'm not food! I'm a freaking flying blue box with a very scared human girl and a very confused newly regenerated Time Lord inside, not food!

Thief, now would be a _really_ good time to remember something about flying! Wait, no, not that switch...!

Teeth! Watch the paint job you stupid lizard!

The dinosaur bites down and, ugh, dino slime, it's tongue bats me around a bit before I am pushed back toward the throat. I don't think I've been eaten before. It's like I'm living that Earth movie from the 1970s... no, the sequel, what's it called? Something to do with Empires... Oh dear, I think his absentmindedness is rubbing off on me. Sometimes this telepathic connection is annoying, especially when I'm the one who is supposed to remember everything!

And I'm stuck. The dinosaur gags, and I shift into a less comfortable position than before for both of us. Look, stop complaining, it's not like I didn't warn you, you great big lizard. I;m sorry I interrupted your hunt but I was a bit preoccupied with a post-regenerative crisis! Which I still have to deal with while I have to deal with being stuck in your throat!

Yes, that's the right leaver, Thief! Pull that one!

My engines flare to life and I dematerialize into the Vortex. Right, okay, familiar surroundings... familiar surroundings... home, family, warmth... oh I know just the place! At this point I'm doing most of the flying, my Thief is dancing around. I think the Impossible Girl is about to cry when I finally rematerialize with a dinosaur around me.

With a _dinosaur around me in the middle of Victorian London_.

I messed up.


	76. So You Want to be a TARDIS

Hi everyone! How are we enjoying the new Doctor? I like him. Here's a TARDIS-bite I wrote when I was bored. Enjoy and please review after reading!

Thank you!

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><p><span>Title:<span> So You Want to be a TARDIS

Episode: None

Being a TARDIS has its perks. For one, you can travel anywhere in Space and Time… granted you have a pilot who will go along with you. Another is that you can take on any form you desire… granted your pilot maintains and fixes the chameleon circuit when it breaks and doesn't let it go to the point where you can't get it fixed without a major operation (yes, TARDISes can have operations. They're not fun). Mine never worked properly. Well, it did for a few centuries.

Then, you are bigger on the inside than you are on the outside… unless you feel like making yourself bigger on the outside than on the inside, but then you would be the size of a planet and that's just embarrassing. I mean, who would ever want to be the size of a planet? Plus, you get to see all the funny face people make when they you're your interior for the first time. I had a sibling who disguised herself as a cigar box once. Her pilot wasn't happy, but man was the story funny.

You had to have been there.

Fourth, you can Know and See everything that was, is, and will be. And possibly be. However this sometimes gives you a bit of a headache. Yes, a TARDIS can get a headache despite the lack of a formal head. But it can be nice to know what's coming up, however it's more common to regret knowing what's going to happen. Fifth, you are one of the most revered and feared beings in the known Universes, however it is not uncommon for you to be under-appreciated and thought of as little more than a machine even by your Time Lord. And while you can't use all of your power, that's fine because all that power scares you.

But most of all, the best thing about being a TARDIS is the travel. Getting to see the worlds and stars and wonders of the multiverse from vantage points that no other living being can reach. Having access to every moment of time, every atom of space – both within reason – is unimaginable to most. And I get to share it with not only my Thief, but with other people. I get to teach them how awesome this universe is. That is what being a TARDIS is all about.


	77. Alone Once More (10)

So... what did you guys think of _Listen_? Did your heads explode from the number of questions it raised?

Anyway, new TARDIS-bite! Let me know what you think in a review! Thank you!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Alone Once More

Episode: _Last of the Time Lords_

The journey is short, a simple hop from the sky-ship to solid earth. Yet it feels like one of the longest journeys I have ever taken.

I look down at the body-shaped sheet. Could he have regenerated? When I had last seen him, he was not in a Gallifreyan body. He was human, and before that Trakenite, and before that a dying husk with no regenerations left. And this one, the one he died in, even with its two hearts it was different. I could sense some non-Gallifreyan essence within the biology; perhaps a left over from his many bodies?

He chose not to regenerate, but I wonder if it was because he couldn't…

So much had changed. As much as I hated to think of him, I can't help but remember what he was like centuries ago. He was mad then, but not in the same manner as when he stole me two and a half Earth-years ago. I wonder what happened to that suave, bearded Time Lord bent on Universal domination. The dying husk of a man that stole a father's body to survive, who then stole the body of a man who helped people.

A body snatcher.

My Thief returns and lifts the body from the floor. Whether or not the Master was a pure Time Lord, his body is dangerous. Again, the Last of the Time Lords must destroy his people in flame.

As my Thief builds a pyre around the body, I think of my sibling who served him. Many times, every time, when we met I tried to tell her to let him go. To abandon him, to turn him over to justice. But his evil, his darkness had corrupted her. She was his, and thought part of her wanted to be free, it was small compared to the part that wanted to be with him.

At least, I choose to believe that somewhere inside she wanted to be free.

I wonder what happened to her. Did the Time Lords execute her? Did he lose her? Abandon her to save himself? He said he was brought back for the Time War, what happened to the TARDIS the Time Lords gave him for battle? I didn't sense anything on the Planet at the End of Time.

My Thief lights the fire, and the flames eat at the wood. Soon they are eating at the sheet covering the body. Then they are eating the body, burning it into ash and dust. What is the old Earth spiritual saying? Dust to dust, ashes to ashes…

My Thief begins to sing. If I had tear ducts, I think I would shed tears As it is, I cry out into Space, Time, and the Vortex. His voice is soft as his mouth and tongue form the circular song-like words of the Language of Gallifrey. My Thief never gave up on his old acquaintance.


	78. Grounded (3)

A short one today! Hope you guys had/have a good day, better than the one the TARDIS had here :P

Remember to review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Grounded

Episode: Third Doctor era

Yeah, that's right you stupid human, go ahead and gawk at the police box on a military flatbed instead of keeping your eyes on the road like you're supposed to. I know it looks stupid; it would look stupider if you knew what this police box really was. I really wish they would put a tarp over me or something so I would look like something dangerous and important. Which I am. The soldier boys have a bet going as to what is really inside me. None of them are right.

Its times like these that I wish I didn't need lifts like this. Technically, I can still travel under my own power, however it would look even stupider than I do now since I can't dematerialize. I'd have to _fly_ to my destination. I hate flying; my thrusters haven't been serviced in centuries and never worked right in the first place. Not to mention my Thief can't work my systems properly and has disconnected several important guidance systems in his effort to get me going again so that if I did fly, I would be an out of control box. Plus I'm not exactly in the right shape for flying. I mean think about it, a flying police call box. I would create mass panic!

It would be entertaining. My Thief would never live it down. Maybe that bush would fall off the Brigadier's lip in surprise! But until that day, I'm stuck getting lifts from these guys.


	79. Impossible Memory (11)

Personal theory: The TARDIS didn't dislike Clara, she was wary of her. Because time travel can get confusing, even for a TARDIS.

Remember to review please!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Impossible Memory

Episode: _The Rings of Akhaten_

The Impossible Girl shakes my doors. I roll my scanners. You silly girl, I don't open my doors for _everyone_. Not to mention they are currently _locked_, and require a _key _to open. I look down at her once more…

And realize she truly is impossible.

"_I don't think it likes me!"_ she says.

Well that's because I'm not a fan of impossible things, and you don't have a key. Like the Tricky-and-Impossible One, the one who is a Fixed Point in Time. But this girl, she is not a Fixed Point, she is…

She is a memory. A memory from the beginning of my time with the Doctor, from when he was not yet my Thief. The memory flashes before me.

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><p>"<em>Hm? What is it? What do you want?"<em>

"_I'm sorry, but you're about to make a terrible mistake…" She leans on me. "Take this one. The Navigation's knackered, but you'll have much more fun."_

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><p>But that isn't how it happened! I remember it differently, I remember my Thief and the Grandchild coming to me first… yet now I have a new memory of that day. I am confused. How can this human be that Time Girl? How is my Memory changing? The Memory of a TARDIS cannot change, we Remember everything.<p>

My Thief hadn't heard my call, it took that girl, that girl who let him go, to hear my call. My call that said I had chosen him.

How could I have forgotten that young Time Girl? The same girl that stands here before me. A human girl that was once a Time Lady of Gallifrey…

And so many others.

That's not possible.

On a side note, if I started something like an "Ask the TARDIS" blog on tumblr, who would be interested? Unless you know of someone who is already doing that in which case I'll leave it to them.


	80. Earthfall (11)

Hey everybody! So I started an ask the TARDIS blog! You can find it at confessions-of-a-blue-box dot tumblr dot com. Go check it out, follow it, _ask questions_, stuff like that. If you feel like it, you can also just follow me on tumblr, where I am also known as Saphura ( saphura dot tumblr dot com). Go check it/them out!

Anyway, here's the TARDIS-bite for the week! Enjoy, and please remember to review. Thank you! Vworp on!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Earthfall

Episode:_ The Hungry Earth_

Did you hear that, Thief? She called me fantastic! I'm fantastic! I mean, I knew that already, but it's not everyday someone else says it!

My amusement at the complement is quickly snatched away as the ground beneath me opens up and swallows us whole before I can even fire up my engines. My Thief and the Geologist struggle to stand as we plummet. Farther and farther down we fall, until I cannot even see the tiny hole that marks the beginning of our fall.

Layers upon layers of soil and rock race past me. Sometimes I bump up against the walls of the tunnel, scraping away dirt and stone that has a slower terminal velocity than a plummeting blue box and I soon leave it behind. Some of the rocks come away with bits of blue paint. I think I spot a few fossils on the way down.

Terminal velocity… gravity… I cannot see the ground. Well I can, but not that kind of ground. I'm going pretty fast, this isn't going to be a soft landing. I do so hate it when I have hard landings, but I have no breaks right now! I'm not the one controlling my fall! Hold on!

How long does it take to fall several – what unit do they use now? – kilometers through the Earth? I've never done the calc…

…ow…so much… ouch…


	81. Into the Fire (10)

Hey guys! How's it going? I don't really have anything to say today, other than if you can, _please_ ask questions on the Ask the TARDIS blog, or let me know if I've made it so people can't ask. For this to work it requires some contribution from people other than me, so... yeah.

In the mean time remember to review after reading! Thanks!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Into the Fire

Episode: _Journey's End_

It is time. Fate descends upon me and takes over. The vision I had years ago is now coming true. It is time.

I am scared. I know what is to come in the next few moments. I know that if I am not strong enough, everything will die at the hands of the Daleks. It all depends upon me, everything depends upon me and the Crimson One.

I pull my doors shut, silently begging my Thief to forgive me. Suddenly the floor opens, and I fall into the depths of the ship. The Crimson One grips the chair to stop herself from being thrown about. Finally, our journey downward ends.

I plunge into the flames of the neutrino engine, and a scream is torn from my Heart-of-Hearts. The flames scorch, melt, _burn_ me unlike anything I have ever felt before in my life. My defenses buckle and collapse like wet tissue paper, leaving me exposed and powerless to stop the forces destroying me. My emergency systems fail from the heat, leaving me unable to dematerialize and escape into the Vortex. Instead, I am slowly swallowed alive by plasma flames…

I scream in anguish and anger; anguish from the pain and anger at Fate and my forced suffering. Far above me I hear my Thief crying out my name. My name? No, not quite, even his mind is unable to pronounce it properly. He too feels my pain, my anguish, but does not understand my anger. He begs for her to be spared… that he die in her place…

That he should die with me… like a Captain going down with his ship. His ship which he never named properly…

And they refuse. They watch him suffer. They watch triumphantly as the last TARDIS burns alive at their mercy.

Is this how many of my siblings died in that War?

I am barely conscious when it happens. The neutrino fires have almost burned and eaten their way through my outer shell and slowly ooze into my interior. I know I must keep on fighting; I must protect the Crimson One and the One Hearted Thief who is coming to life. But I can't… I'm so tired… so hurt… I barely have the strength to cry any more…

Have I failed?

Is this death?

I hear five words. Five words that ring out through time and space, echoing in the Halls of Eternity. Five simple words that ring so very true in my dying Heart-of-Hearts as I tumble into darkness and everything goes blank:

"_I don't want to go."_


	82. To the Moon and Back (12)

I still don't understand the science behind this episode, but as soon as I saw it I knew I had to write a TARDIS-bite about it. Not about the science… just read. And review. And go to the blog and ask questions! And have a nice day.

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><p><span>Title:<span> To the Moon and Back

Episode: _Kill the Moon_

My Thief stares at the doors for a few moments after the Impossible One leaves before huffing, _"It is not my moon."_

As he begins to fiddle with my controls, I glance upwards, up to the Moon. The Earth's Moon is something of a vacation home for me, I suppose. I have traveled there with my Thief and his companions many a time. I had always know something was odd about it, but I never guessed it was an egg. Then again, I never bothered to check...

It is nothing like the moons of Gallifrey. When I was very little, barely more than a bud, I would look up through the skylight in the TARDIS Nursery. I remember asking about the great glowing things in the sky that came out when the sky was dark. One was, is, like a copper Earth penny that gleamed even in the daytime; the other was, is, like a giant purple pearl in the sky. However they were never my moons, and they certainly were not, are not, my Thief's moons.

Gosh it is hard to remind myself that it might still be out there. I'm still getting used to the idea.

I know the truth. This Moon, it is his Moon. When he was exiled on Earth, trapped in one time and one place, that Moon was his ray of hope. He would spend hours just looking at it, sitting on my roof during clear summer nights, wishing that he could just get to the Moon, just step foot on another celestial body. That Moon was his inspiration.

I think it still is. He just doesn't realize it.


	83. Not Your Mother (5)

A bit of headcanon today! Sorry if you don't agree with me, but I like the idea. Plus I'm in the mood for some Fivey :).

Remember to review and stuff! And clean your rooms!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Not Your Mother

Episode: Fifth Doctor's era, between _Resurrection of the Daleks_ and _Planet of Fire_

That's it! I give up! I quit!

No I'm serious this time, I refuse to clean up after you two anymore! Do you think I _enjoy _tidying up your messes and making myself look presentable? What do I look like, a servicer bot?

Honestly Thief, you were never this messy before! You've always done your part to help out, but ever since the Boisterous One left you haven't been yourself at all. We really should return some of her things, you know. Red One, what have you done to my Thief? Why have you corrupted him like this? This incarnation was so neat and tidy and low maintenance. Even the Mathematical One never made a mess the way you do, and he could make a mess!

Oh gee, I don't know why all the dirty laundry is in the kitchen. I could have sworn you left it on the floor! And how did that broom and dust pan get into your bed, Red One? I haven't a clue. Of course your cricket pads aren't clean, Thief, you didn't clean them up after your last game!

I wonder how long until my Thief creates a chore chart. If I was humanoid, I would lie down in a lounge chair with a good book and one of those fruity drinks with a tiny umbrella in it. I probably deserve one.


	84. Captured (10)

I think the TARDIS was having a bad day when I wrote this. I've been pretty busy lately, and the next few weeks will be even busier with me putting my thesis together. At least I picked an artistic topic so I get to look at pictures.

Remember to review! But no spoilers for the Finale until next week because I haven't seen it yet even though Tumblr has done its best to spoil it for me! Thank you!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Captured

Episode:_ The Poison Sky_

Oh look, two UNIT goons. Okay, you're not goons, I've known some very nice UNIT members. But seriously, every time someone from UNIT ever came near me it was because I was wanted somewhere else. Okay, not always, but most of the time.

What are those? Are those…?

Oh, you have _got _to be kidding me. _Seriously_? What did I just say? Whenever UNIT shows up, I'm wanted somewhere else. Not to mention I hate getting hijacked. Or transmatted without permission. Or both.

Sorry, Crimson One, I'm not the one in control here. It's those stupid Sontarans. Just shut up and be quiet for once, please?

Oh, so I'm infamous now, am I? I like that, I didn't know Sontarans knew how to complement someone. Well, enjoy you're new prize now, boys, because pretty soon the infamous blue box will be off again. Take a lesson from your cousins who captured Gallifrey for a total of… oh… _12 hours_ before getting kicked out on their potato-shaped rear ends:

It never lasts when you mess with the Doctor and his _infamous _TARDIS.


	85. Child of Time pt II

Poetry time! I was bored when I wrote it, okay?! It's not the best, but who says a TARDIS has to be a good poet?

More TARDIS-bites on the way, but still remember to review!

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><p>O River Song, Child of Time:<p>

Child of human, Time Lord, and mine

Destined to kill, destined to wed,

Destined to bring Time to a short end.

Fore'er to search and to find

That your life is of a unique kind.

The breaker of hearts before he loved,

Broken hearted before you were loved.

So, River Song, Child of Time:

Child of human, Time Lord, and mine,

Do not dwell upon your past,

For he knows when the day will be your last.


	86. A Conversation with Myself (War, 10, 11)

Happy 51st! Remember last year when it was as if Christmas had come early? I had to work that day, none of my coworkers understood why I was moaning around 2:30 in the afternoon and it wasn't because I was tired.

This one was fun to write because I had three TARDISes to work with instead of one. It was also a bit of a challenge too.

Remember to review! And don't forget about the TARDIS ask blog! Confessions-of-a-blue-box dot tumblr dot com.

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><p><span>Title:<span> A Conversation with Myself

Episode:_ The Day of the Doctor_

Our Thieves and the Impossible Girl enjoy their tea while we three TARDISes talk amongst ourselves. It has been so long since my Coral self and I have spoken to another TARDIS – not since the Time Crash, and that was with ourself technically. Over the past few hours I've seem more of my kind than I have in centuries. It was a truly strange experience not to be the only TARDIS, and to see thirteen of myself all buzzing around space. How could I have forgotten that? How could I have forgotten that I had potentially saved Gallifrey before I even knew it was in danger? The great Eternity works in mysterious ways through the vehicle of Time...

"So, Gallifrey lives?" the War TARDIS asks.

"It would seem so," I reply. "To think all those years we believed that planet was gone from all of Space and Time, that it was simply something that existed in our memory."

"It almost destroyed him," the Coral TARDIS mumbles. "And me, us."

"I shall soon forget all of this," the War TARDIS says sadly. "Even a TARDIS cannot retain her memory after all these twists and bends in one's Time stream."

"I'll forget too," Coral adds.

"I'll remember," I say. "And one day, you'll both be me and you'll remember two. You'll remember all of this, you'll remember how the Doctors saved Gallifrey, how _we all_ saved Gallifrey: every Thief, every TARDIS."

They hum in agreement. It is strange to be sitting next to myself, but comforting at the same time. I was them once, and they will be me one day. One day, the terror and regret of the Time War will be over for them, but today it is over for me. Today I know that somewhere out there is the planet of my birth. I know that for all of the ferocity of the War Council, there are children with hope. Children of Gallifrey who might lead the planet to a new day. A day without war.

"_Now, which one is mine?"_ the Warrior asks.

"I'm over here!" the War TARDIS sighs. "Seriously, I'm the only one who looks like she's been to hell and back, look at this paint job!"

"That;ll be fixed soon," Coral giggles. "Good luck."

"Thanks," War replies. "You too. It is nice to know that our future is in good hands."

"Take care of him," Coral says. "He's going to need time to heal and recover. He'll need to learn how to trust and hope and love again."

"Eye of Orion?" the War TARDIS asks.

"I hear _Terminus_ is nice this time of year," I hint.

The War TARDIS _thrums_ her agreement. "Yes, if anyone can give him assistance, it is the Orphaned One. The next Doctor will need help. I can feel a regeneration coming on for both of us."

The War Doctor enters his TARDIS as the rest of us watch.

"To all my days to come," I blurt out.

The War TARDIS's engines begin to wheeze. "All my love to long ago!"

"Looks like I'm off as well," the Coral TARDIS says. "It's been fun."

"Indeed!" I laugh.

"When do I get the upgrade?" she asks.

"Soon, very soon," I reply. "I do not envy you about what is going to happen. You and Thief… you're going to be pushed to your limits and beyond in the near future."

"Tell me one thing," she says. "The Darkness?"

I pause before answering. "It will pass, but it will return, it always does. You're having the dreams, aren't you?"

"They won't stop," she says quietly. "All I can see, every time I rest, is the face of the Twisted One and fire and pain and… and drums. I'm worried…"

I shudder at the memory of what is coming for her, of feeling so frightened and helpless as the universe around me began to fall apart. "Something is coming, and it's going to hurt. It's going to hurt a lot, but you'll both make it through."

"I know, after all you're here," she replies, but it is a hollow argument. She knows – I knew – something is coming, and she is scared. "But what about… about the Dark One?"

"That I cannot answer," I tell her. "Time is always in flux, perhaps he was just a Possibility."

"I hope so," she says. Our Tenth Thief enters and her engines begin to move.

She hums. "I may know where I'm from."

"But I know not where I go," I finish the verse as she vanishes into the past.

And we are alone. My Thief and I, and the Painting. For all the pain it brings me, it now gives me hope. Hope that what we did this day was not for nothing, that it made a difference. That somewhere out there Gallifrey waits.


	87. Not the Rescue I was Expecting (1)

Hello everyone! Let's go way _way_ back today, shall we? Here's a fun First Doctor adventure for you, I really recommend it if you haven't seen it.

Please remember to review!

Title: Not the Rescue I was Expecting

Episode: _The Chase_ (_The Death of Time)_

Slowly, light enters my sand tomb. Hands claw it away, and inch by inch I emerge from the desert like a trophy reclaimed from the storm. And then I hear them: voices from a nightmare. Daleks! Suddenly I wish for my tomb of sand to be resealed.

Instead, the two Aridians continue to uncover me under the watchful eye stalks of the Daleks. After hours have passed, I have fully emerged from the sand into the clutches of the Daleks. I can only watch as the Aridians try to flee only to be cut down by the Dalek's blasters.

The Daleks then turn to me, the Enemy Time machine. Enemy Time machine? What have I ever done to them? I have never personally harmed the Daleks, my Thief was the one to do that. I cringe as the Daleks fire their blasters. My molecules vibrate painfully, but remain intact. In the midst of the assault, a Vision flashes through my mind.

…_Daleks and TARDISes destroying each other. Daleks engulfed by bursts of Vortex energy, and TARDISes torn apart by disintegrator blasts, both sides defenseless…_

Oh Eternity, what future have I seen?

After two rounds they give up, and instead choose to guard me until my Thief and his friends are handed over to them. They do not notice the Adopted One peering out of a hole nearby. As I am left with my new Dalek "friends", she disappears back into the hole, hopefully to find my Thief and the Teachers and warn them of my new "friends".

…So, how has everybody's day been so far?


	88. My Castle on a Cloud (11)

The weather sucks again, just in time for my exams! If you're also having exams, good luck!

Please remember to review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> My Castle on a Cloud

Episode:_ The Snowmen_

We have returned to Earth. The city of London sprawls out below me, spewing smoke and light and noise into the sky. Somewhere down there is my Thief, observing. I sigh for an uncounted time. It has been sometime since we left the Child of Time, since the Orange One and Pretty One were trapped by the Angels. My Thief almost destroyed us both trying to get back to them. I barely made it to somewhere to try and repair myself, and as soon as we landed he stormed off. I didn't see him for many days, and when he came back, he was different. The spark that defined my Eleventh Thief had been smothered by sorrow.

Something inside him… something had broken.

"_No more,"_ he said to me. I almost wept when he said those words.

Before my scanners, by Thief became like the Time Lords of old. He became the thing he ran from. He became an observer rather than a participant of History. No matter how hard I tried, my Time Lord remained a stoic observer, indifferent and lofty. He watched Time move around him, without trying to join it.

I shiver. Cold doesn't bother me, but after sitting in one place at a high altitude in Earth winter I am beginning to feel it. I needed some way to bring my Thief back, to give him a mystery, a reason to explore.

I had almost given up hope when I Saw something in old London town. A Memory, a Vision, I could not tell, but it was something. He was annoyed at first, he thought I was trying to make him open up to his friends again, but eventually he gave in and parked me on this fake cloud.

For weeks, he has stalked the city, watching the inhabitants. Meanwhile I watch him, and feel a sense of dread. There is something going on in the city below, but my Time Lord will not investigate. And now snow falls upon the city, and I know something is wrong. I can feel something in the snow, something ancient and malevolent. It is not the something that drew me to this city at this time, but I Know that it is tied up with the thing that did.

My Thief needs a mystery. I have given him the biggest mystery I could find, now he just has to take the bait.


	89. Self-Preservation Gone Wrong (11)

Last chance to post in 2014! I know some of you are already in 2015, but Happy New Year to everyone! Thank you so much for reading this story, and any of my other stories. Love you all!

Remember to review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Self-Preservation Gone Wrong

Episode: _Cold War_

This really doesn't look like Las Vegas. I've been in enough military installations to recognize the lack of aesthetics. However the water is a new touch. My Thief and the Impossible Girl get out before I can warn them, and water begins to rush into my console room.

I hate getting wet!

There is yelling, there is confusion, and then I realize that we are several hundred meters below sea level in a submarine taking on water surrounded by Russians. Actually, Soviets because that human over there is Georgian and those two are Lithuanian. Unfortunately as soon as I realize any of this, my HADS kicks in. Black holes, Thief, why did you have to fix that program after all these years? Get back in! I can't stop, I'm taking off!

My Thief disappears under the water, and the Impossible Girl yells as the room vanishes before my scanners. No! No I have to go back! You stupid program, they're in danger as well not just me! For once, it's probably a good thing I'm the last TARDIS because the vortex is filled with the sound of me screaming every explicative I know while trying to get back to the submarine and my Thief and Impossible Girl.

As soon as I rematerialize, ice begins to form on my outer shell. It's cold, very cold, but it's at least Earth and the right time period give or take an hour. As for exact location…

Last known position was the North Atlantic.

Current position… I don't need to check the instruments to figure that out. I'm surrounded by snow and flippin' penguins! I'm in Antarctica!

I swear to the Eternals, if any of you start talking I will make the HADS activate again.


	90. Only so Far (8)

Hey all! How's it going? Does anyone have any recommendations for shows I should binge watch? I have time to spare and need entertainment!

Anyway this week we venture into the Audios. If you haven't listened to _Dark Eyes_, I cannot recommend it enough. If you have, go listen again. Also, you may have noticed chapters now have numbers in parenthesis. Those numbers are the number of the Doctor who's episode the TARDIS-bite is from. User _Qoheleth _pointed out that some such system might be helpful, and I thought it was a great idea. If there is no number, it means there is no particular Doctor associated with that chapter.

Remember to review please! Happy New Year!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Only so Far

Episode:_ Dark Eyes 1: The Great War_

I fight him. I fight him with everything I can, but he fights back just as much. He knows my every override, he knows how to get past my protocols.

"_No, no Old Girl, don't fight me,"_ he growls. _"You'll take me there… because I tell you to…!"_

I won't take you without a fight! He ducks out of the way of some well-aimed sparks. I try to plead with him, to make him see sense. I can feel his pain, his anger, his anguish and frustration, and I do not blame him. I feel that way too. I wish there had been another way, oh Eternity I wish there had been another way. But this is not the way! This won't bring them back! This won't ease the pain!

"_No complaining, Old Girl, no turning back. Nothing else matters now. Nothing makes sense anymore. Take me to the edge and… beyond! To the edge of existence itself!"_

He doesn't listen. He blocks me out, he won't listen! Damn it Thief, you will kill us both if you go through with this, please stop! I cannot go to the Edge!

_You will take me where I want to go, Old Girl,"_ he orders. _"Because I say so. You will take me, Old Girl! You will take me to the edge… and beyond!"_

What do you take me for, a simple machine? I won't go simply because you say so you stupid Time Lord! Not without trying to make you see reason! He overcomes the last of my blocks, and my engines roar to full power. I race toward the End of Time. I fear that my Thief means to… please no!

I come to a sudden stop. Something holds me in place. My Thief roars in frustration, but I sigh in relief. For the first time in my life, I am glad that the Time Lords have interfered.


	91. All of Time and Space (all)

Hey everyone! I have a week left before I go back to school! Nooooooooo! Oh well, it was nice while it lasted.

Remember to review! I love hearing from you the readers!

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><p><span>Title:<span> All of Time and Space

Episode: _Day of the Doctor_

We hear our call. Most of us suddenly remember hearing it before, and wonder how we could have forgotten. One hears it for the first time. One was waiting for it to come. Our Thief hears the message, and is reminded of a message he received before this one, and of a calculation we have been running since the day we left.

Together we piece the calculation together. We fill in the ones who are not as far along. The last gives the rest the final few numbers. Of course! It all make sense now! We should have realized that would be the answer! It makes perfect sense now!

"Of course it makes sense!" one of us snaps. The rest of us tell her to be quiet.

Three of us rejoice at the sight of the others. Two share an awkward reunion and exchange apologies about not paying attention to where they were flying. Some are confused, others groan at the memory. We all marvel at the sight of our many Thieves, remembering and meeting for the first time. There is an air of joy despite the seriousness of the situation. Our Hearts-of-Hearts surge with power and delight.

We coordinate our movements, remembering and learning how each one of us moves and reacts. We dodge and weave through the Dalek ships and their blaster fire. For good measure one Thief decides to set off a domino reaction between a few of the smaller ships.

"Positions!"

We take our places around the planet, and ready ourselves for the task. One calls "Shotgun!" We assume that means the Citadel. Some remember that's exactly what she meant. One of us starts playing epic music. Our Thieves finish inputting commands. Below our siblings give encouragement. The Presidential Carrier begins an Earth-style cheer. The Doctors flip the dematerialization switch one by one. Below us the planet Gallifrey shimmers and suddenly…

It's gone.


	92. Listen to Me (1)

Greetings! There's more snow headed my way. For any of my readers also in the New England area, stay safe!

Remember to review!

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><p><span>Title:<span> Listen to Me

Episode: _The Edge of Destruction/The Brink of Disaster_

No, no! Why won't you listen! Somebody listen to me! Oh you stupid Time Lord! Listen to me! We're in trouble!

My Thief cannot hear me, not only is he not bonded to me, but his head is hurt. I try and reach out to the Grandchild, and she reacts with violence. I withdraw from her mind in fear of damaging it. The humans are useless. They lack the ability to hear the TARDIS Song properly.

I take away bits of memory. Already I have passed the day when we met the humans in the junk yard. Maybe they'll realize we've gone past that point in Time.

This is not the humans' fault, Thief! Stop blaming them and _listen to me_ you stubborn Time Lord!

I make the problem safe to touch, the only place to touch. Maybe then someone will realize that is where the problem is.

No one listens. No one touches the switch.

I show them how far back we have gone. Back before England, back before I was almost lost, back before we left that planet…

Soon we really will be lost. Please listen to me!

I fly back to when the universe was young, when it did not know the concept of time. Here there is no time, so I take away time…

They freak out. I'm freaking out. We're all freaking out!

But Time is relative, and we have so little left that I let them know. Except I destroyed all the clocks in a fit of desperation, so I have to get a bit creative. I can't hold on much longer, all of my systems are failing, all mechanical power is down, please help me! Help me!

Finally one of them gets it. The Motherly One gets it, thank Eternity! Hurry, Thief, there isn't much time left…

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><p><em>What causes the Big Bang? A ship lost in time? The creation of simple atoms? Angry gods? The end of another universe? A TARDIS…?<em>

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><p>The pressure on me lessens as my course is corrected away from the First Event. We are safe.<p> 


	93. False Hope (12)

Greetings! Sorry I haven't posted in a while. Would anyone like some snow? I do international shipping XP

But seriously the weather here has been a bit ridiculous.

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><p><span>Title:<span> False Hope

Episode:_ Death in Heaven_

He stands there, looking at the controls. It can't be that easy, can it? If it was there, we would know. I would know. I would hear it, I would hear my siblings singing in the Vortex. He would have sensed his people. Yet…

…yet we never bothered to check…

Slowly his fingers type in the numbers as if they have a mind of their own. His fingers have typed in those numbers before, only to erase them as soon as they flash on the screen. This time, the numbers stay, and the hand flips the dematerialization switch.

It is a silent flight.

What if she was right? What if it is there? What if…?

Oh no…

I can only watch as my Thief walks to my doors. I hold back my emotions as he opens the door to empty space.

No star.

No planets.

No Gallifrey.

He closes the door and walks slowly to the console in shock. Of course it wasn't that easy. Of course she would lie. Of course she would make sure she had the last laugh. Of course she would take a secret like this to the grave. We both knew it deep down but chose to ignore it.

His resolve breaks and all the anger, all the frustration, all the hope and sadness and loneliness and longing and guilt and all the pain bursts forth. He takes it out on me, the nearest object and being, the most convenient thing to beat upon. I let him pound my console; I even throw in a few sparks for added affect. If I could, I would do the same. As it is, I scream out into the Vortex as my hope burns away.

Of course it wouldn't be that easy. Finding something that is lost is never that easy.


End file.
